depression related break-up
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| Sun, 11-21-2004 - 6:12pm |
Hello,
I am so confused and feel so rejected....
My boyfriend (off and on for ten years) broke up with me 7 weeks ago when I finally blew up because he had stopped being affectionate. He has complained of being very depressed over the last two years we were together. He could never afford health insurance or meds. Anyway, when I gave him an ultimatium he chose to leave. He said my need for affection made him feel overwhelmed, attacked and pushed. I asked him if he had any feelings for me and he said he felt numb about everything. He said he was sorry and he felt responsible for my pain.
I am confused because part of me wants to believe his depression played a role in his decision to break it off and another part of me thinks he just used it as an excuse to get out of a relationship he was no longer happy in.
We are both 46. He has never been in a relationship that last over 18 months. We were the longest even though it was off and on. I told him I don't want to be friends so I will probably never talk to him again.
I want to move on. He was hard to be around. Any feedback would be appreciated. I feel SO REJECTED!!
Majatheb

Welcome to the board. There is no way to divide it all. There will never be a way to say, "yes, it was the depression" or "no, he needed the relationship to be done."
I wish there was a way to tell you exactly.
There are many break up boards here at ivillage. There may be a place like here for you to get help. We can give you insight into the belly of the beast that is depression. Those folks who are in relationships may be able to tell you why they stay in even when they feel bad.
I can't remember what a relationship is like. LOL
Welcome again. I hope you can find some answers here or at one of the relationship boards.
Sending hugs and good thoughts your way.
Take care,
Lisa-)
Co-CL Depression Support