Help me understand my depressed H
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| Sat, 11-27-2004 - 1:40am |
My H is 46 years old and suffers from depression/anxiety. He is on Remeron and Lexapro. He sees a psychiatrist for his medications, but, so far, refuses to see an IC. My H seems tired all the time. He doesn't take care of himself (binges on foods, esp. ice cream, and doesn't exercise). He has gained 30 lbs. since being on the Remeron. Although he is on medication and says he feels better, I cannot tell a difference; he still acts and seems depressed. He isolates himself from us (3 children and myself) and spends most of his weekend "resting" in bed.
I think he should see an IC. I've suggested marriage counseling, too, but he won't hear of it. He has no idea (b/c he won't ask) how long he has to be on AD medication. Our sex life is non-existent.
I can only be supportive for so long. I understand depression is an illness, like diabetes, but most diabetics are pro-active in taking care of themselves through diet and exercise. I feel that if my H would eat a little better, maybe exercise and lose some weight, his energy might return and he'd feel better. Am I off base? My H says I nag him when I bring this up. Also, I want to go with him to his next psychiatrist app't. so I can tell her how my H is at home (no energy, stays in bed all weekend, no sex, etc.) When he goes to see the psychiatrist he just tells her everything is okay, which, in my opinion, it isn't.
Any feedback is appreciated.
Thanks in advance,
Lonely Mom

Hugs to you, you are doing the best you can.