Feeling lost...don't know what to do....

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Feeling lost...don't know what to do....
14
Wed, 12-01-2004 - 11:25am

My son (14yrs) has lived away from me for almost two years. He went and lived with his biological father for about a year (which was one big disaster). He was going to move back with me but my depression was so bad I felt it would be better if maybe he lived with my sister in Toronto. I ended up giving custody of my son to my sister :o(. I'm pretty sure he hates me now but he was getting in all sorts of trouble and I felt he could have a better life with my sister as she has so much more to offer than I do. The problem is he wants me to come up to Toronto this weekend and stay for a week, I have such a hard time just getting myself out of the house without having a panic attack. I've tryed to explain it to him but he doesnt understand, I don't expect him to understand he is only 14, I guess he just wants his mommy. How do I deal with this? how do I get rid of the guilt I feel? how do I make him understand? I'm just lost and don't know what to do :o(. Please help!!!!!

Donna

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Fri, 12-03-2004 - 4:46pm

Thanks for the irish hugs Mary, so hard being a mom sometimes. I feel we have a pretty good relationship, it's just hard being apart, not a day that goes by that I don't cry for him. Thank goodness for computers though, we see each other all the time on the cam, that helps both of us with the separation thing. Big hugs to you, thanks for caring.

Donna

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Fri, 12-03-2004 - 4:52pm

Thanks so much Judie, I really appreciate it :o). I will be seeing him over Christmas, but I think I won't say anything till afterwards, I don't want to ruin it for him. Thank for such good advice. Hugs to you.

Donna

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Fri, 12-03-2004 - 4:58pm

Thanks Nicola ((HUGS)). He's in Bramton and I'm near Kingston, I know it's not far, but it seems so scary, wish I could just make eveything right. I will be seeing him at Christmas so we're both looking foward to that, (I can't wait :o)). Hope you get feeling better, know I'm always here. :o)

Donna

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Fri, 12-03-2004 - 5:00pm

Thanks Erin for the support, it means alot. I will be seeing him over Christmas :o). Hope all is well for you.

Donna

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