Lonely
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| Fri, 12-03-2004 - 3:57pm |
Hi there -
I'm new here and just felt the urge to post. I just moved 1000 miles away from home for the first time ever. My fiance got a job offer that was just too good to pass up, so here we are. I don't have a job yet, so I just sit at home all day. I don't have any friends or family here, and my fiance works so much that I'm left alone most of the time. Ever since we moved here I just feel lonely and confused. I don't eat, I don't go anywhere, all that I want to do is sleep and be left alone. I know that its not good or normal to feel this way, but I don't know what to do to stop it. I hate feeling so isolated. I feel invisible, like nobody knows or cares anything about me. My fiance tries to understand, but he just doesn't. I feel absolutely worthless all of the time - I don't even change out of my pj's most of the time. What's the point?
Sorry for the rambling...I just don't know what to do to make things better here. I want to go home so badly that I can't stand it.

Im glad that you found us here. I actually think it is a normal reaction to feel the way you do. You have gone through a huge transition in your life & it seems like you feel like you have no direction right now, and its totally understandable that you are feeling depressed, I know I would too.
If I were in your position, I think I would try and live as normally as possible for a certain period of time. Maybe it just requires some time to adjust. I would also communicate my feelings with the fiance, so that he knows what is going on in your mind. If after giving it a good try and some time, you feel the same, then I would rethink the whole thing. If you know you are going to be unhappy there forever, then is it worth it? I would just ask myself questions like that. I hope this helps a little and I hope to see you on the board again really soon. Please let us know how you are doing. Lonliness is one of the scariest feelings I have ever felt, and Ive felt it plenty so I can relate to you a little bit. Please take care ok :)
First, I have to say that anyone who majors in anthropology is very cool :)
Secondly, I think your reaction is perfectly normal given the circumstances. You are in a new city without anyone to turn to besides your fiance. You are looking for a job. You are alone alot, etc. I think the first thing you need to do is have a schedule every day. Get dressed, shower, clean the house a bit and definitely exercise. I have been where you are and I think the best thing you can do is force yourself out of the house every day. Even if it is just for a ten minute walk. The library would also be a great place to go. That way you can kill two birds with one stone, look for a job and get out of the house.
I know this time will pass and you will survive and do good. However, while you are in this rut, please post. Maybe some of us can keep up your spirits a bit:) I wish there was some magical pill for bad times but there isn't. Just remember this is just a circumstance and that none of this is your fault in the least.
I know you will do well :) :)