doing a bit better...triggers

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2004
doing a bit better...triggers
1
Wed, 12-08-2004 - 6:45pm
and i will babble on a bit....I am doing a bit better today, but still unhappy....not crying as much - and my pdoc DID finally call last nite. raised my wellbutrin to 300mg ...will see how that works....my solution for last nite to keep myself safe was to just go to sleep...the phone kept ringing after i did go to sleep, and i wouldn't even answer it. and now, my bf (former fiance - gave him the ring back in august...) is not understanding why when i make plans to do things for me i get out of my "down" but i can hardly keep up with things around the house. it's the day-to-day things that i can't manage most of the time...and when i can, it seems as though it's when i am in a hypo-manic phase (i don't know which is worse...being even all the time or having an occasional hypo mood...at least the house gets cleaned...) i have talked to my pdoc about this and the down side is that my hypo-mania could trigger buying sprees again, and that just would not be a good thing....so i guess i am just oging to have to work through this for now. what started all this was that we thought we had everything under control and in early october i attempted - took a handful of my sleeping pills because i decided that my daughter who is almost 4 doesn't need to grow up with a "crazy" mom. she needs better than me. left a note and eveything. ended up in the emergency room and 2 nite in the psych hosp. and since i work for health & human services -- it was not a pleasant time - i was more worried about who at work knew about everything (because it was an involuntary hospitalization....) than i was about anything else. i just wanted to get back to work and tell everyone that this was wrong....so that i could get out of there. So, after a discussion with my doc, we decided that i really wasn;t doing better, that I had obviously bottomed out and needed a second anti-depressant (or a complete med change - which with the holidays coming up, we decided against....) so now here i am, still down, not sure if i am getting better or worse....but glad that i have found this board....because when i was preg, the moms on bed rest board was definitely a life saver (2 months of that!!!) i will probably be around alot - for a while anyway...until i am feeling better...which some days feels like never....but it is good to know that i have somewhere to go....and women who understand
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2004
Wed, 12-08-2004 - 8:24pm

glad you are doing a bit better - every bit counts.


and I think it is great that you went to bed/sleep to stay safe and let the phone ring - I've done that on a few occasions, and woke up the next morning glad that i didn't do anything stupid.


give the Wellbutrin higher dose a chance to work and keep posting if that helps. It helps us too!

peace and love,


just_a_big_kid


Sue

peace and love,

just_a_big_kid