I have fallen! Which way is up?
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| Mon, 12-20-2004 - 8:23am |
This is a confession that I just need to talk about. I have been caring for a sick mother for about 1 1/2 years now. She has an industrial injury and has been diagnosed with a panic disorder w/ depression. Listen, I have been TRYING so hard to keep up with her mood swings and the black cloud that surrounds my home now... But this is about ME. As I said before, I have been trying so hard not to join my mother, but I'll tell you the truth. I am just as surprised as the next that for the past two weeks I have not cared about anything. Christmas lights are still in the box. I have slept one week away already and my stomach is doing rounds. I couldn't stop crying today and I can't sleep. What gets me is that for all this time I never once lost faith that I can get through this. Yet in the last two weeks I have NO faith in anything. Yeah, I'm pretty scared about that. My question is: Is it possible to get depression from someone else? Please help. Thank you.
Blue

Dear Blue~
No, depression isn't "catching"; you can't "get" it from someone else. However, living with someone with depression can be stressful, and if that person has physical ailments as well, then that makes it more so. Caregivers often experience stress and depression b/c what you are doing is hard, physically and emotionally, and you don't get a break. It's like mothers of young children. I would suggest that you talk to your doctor about how you are feeling and see if you need help. I would also suggest talking to your mother's doctor about respite care. Is it possible to get someone in to help out a couple of days a week? This may be covered by your insurance or may be a free service (I live in Canada and it's covered here); I'm not sure. But I am sure that you need some time off, every day if possible. What you are feeling is normal, but that doesn't make it any easier. Please talk to someone about getting help.
~Nicola
(((Blue))) You are not "catching" depression from anyone. But the situation you are dealing with can certainly bring on a bout of situational depression. You are normal to be stressed out by this. It is not an easy situation.
There is a board that specifically deal's with people giving care to loved ones.
Caregiver's support:
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-bhcaregivers
You do have every right to feel down and depressed about your situation. Even though you did not "catch" depression from your mom, you certainly could have been stressed enough to have earned the illness on your own.
Prolonged interaction with a depressed person. And prolonged stress can create depression, no doubt in my mind.
You are here now. You will find on this board every walk of life. Mom's and single girls. Grandmom's and wild women. You never know...*wink*
But you will find loving and kindness of all kinds.
Post more to us, and share with someone you may feel connected to. You never know, helping one of us, even a little, may make you feel better.
Sending hugs and good thoughts your way.
Take care,
Lisa-)
Co-CL Depression Support