Discouraged & depressed *trigger*

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2004
Discouraged & depressed *trigger*
Thu, 01-06-2005 - 7:16pm

I'm currently taking 30 mg of Prozac in the morning and 50 mg of Trazodone at night. I originally had a really bad reaction when I started taking the Trazodone with the Prozac, but it's better now. I haven't been sick again.

Anyway, the point that I'm trying to get to is that I don't think the medication is enough. I don't know if I need different medication or higher dosages, but I just still feel depressed all the time. I'm going to therapy, and I like it, but I'm just feeling so discouraged. I think about hurting myself by slitting my wrists all the time because I want to get my family and guy friends' attention. It's not that I want to get back at anyone - it's just that I want them to notice me and realize how much they all love me.

I've talked with my therapist about this a little bit, but I don't want him to institutionalize me, so I try to downplay it a little bit so that he won't think it's too serious. He says that I have more control over my actions than I think, but sometimes I just feel so out of control! Plus, the thoughts really bother me even if I haven't acted on them yet.