job causing depression

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2004
job causing depression
8
Mon, 01-10-2005 - 4:17pm
Is there anyone out there who feels that their job is causing their depression? I feel like that. I changed careers and started teaching in August. I have been miserable ever since. I try my best at it and try to fake being happy, but I can barely get up in the morning to go to work. I cry every day, when noone is looking. I've been this way since August and don't know how I will make it to mid-June. My kids go to this school and I know a lot of people there. I feel so guilty about the way I am feeling. I should be grateful I have a job. I have trouble sleeping, am anxious. I even tried to resign a few months ago but my principal said she wanted me to stay and that I should see a dr for the anxiety..I did that and he gave me medication, but I feel like it is getting worse. I am fine when we are on a break (such as Christmas break) so I am sure that this new job is what is causing me the problems. I'm usually an optimistic person and I have been feeling so down since August. If I resign, I have no other job lined up yet...although I am sending out resumes. Anyway, does anyone have advice on how I can cope or would you consider resigning if you felt your health was being affected? Is there anyone out there in a similar situation?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Mon, 01-10-2005 - 5:23pm

Hi there.


Well I do know that your job can add to your depression, it certainly did in my case.

*hugs             

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2004
Mon, 01-10-2005 - 6:15pm

Hey, I can agree that jobs can contribute to your depression. It may not be the only thing to make you depressed however. There just may be fewer stressors when you are on break, or your family may simply make you feel less depressed. That is my experience, when I visit home, I have a good time with my family, it is hard for them to figure that I am depressed.

Is there counseling available at your work? There is often stuff you can get that is free, and confidential. Just a thought.

I hope that you find some help. Work can so contribute to depression. I am sorry that I can't be of more help.

Sending hugs and good thoughts your way.
Take care,
Lisa-)

Co-CL Depression Support Board

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2004
Tue, 01-11-2005 - 5:03am
Same for me. I know it is my job..dread mornings I have to work..can't get going. But on holiday's and weekends...I am up early and motivated. Not sure why I hate my job even...but know I do. I have wanted out for years but the money is good and will have hard time finding job of same pay and I need the money. So I have made a deal with myself. If I quit smoking...the money I save will help provide the difference in pay I will lose if I change jobs. YOU have a degree. YOU can get a job elsewhere. If you KNOW it is the job and those demands...let's face it, teaching is a round the clock job that can suck the life out of you especially if you don't enjoy it. If you KNOW it is the job; use your degree for something else. Lay in bed and day dream. Visualize yourself waking up in a new life. Pay attention to the details of the day dream. What does your bedroom look like in your new life...how do you feel...who is with you...what do you do when you wake up...picture yourself getting ready for work..what are you wearing ...look at the clock..what time is it...how do you get there...where is the work...what is the job. Hope that helps.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2004
Tue, 01-11-2005 - 1:02pm
I had a job that was causing me grief everytime I stepped inside the doors. I didn't feel I could leave because I made fairly good money. My husband had a near fatal car accident last May and I had to quit. I feel so much better now. I am still taking antidepressants but I am better than going to that job everyday that I hated. I hope you can spare your health and do the same. Nothing is worth your health.
Diane
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2004
Tue, 01-11-2005 - 3:43pm

I haven't had a job cause me to be depressed, but i've been depressed at work and had the stress of work cause some anxiety and depression. I'm also a teacher.

I want you to know that I feel like the principal overstepped her bounds. If you are a teacher you are hired by a school board. The principal can not tell you to stay and see a doctor. If you feel you are in the wrong place, and it is detrimental to your health, then YOU have the right to do with yourself what YOU choose.

Another solution is to take an unspecified leave of absence for health reasons. If she won't listen to your needs go to your human resources person, but you have to speak up for you.

I'm so sorry that you didn't enjoy teaching we need so many good teachers, I'm sure you make a good one. I'd rather have a happy, healthy, good teacher who was able to do her best possible for her classroom, than a good teacher who was having a difficult time making it through each day. That is why I have taken an extended leave of absence from my kids. It was one of the hardest things i have had to do. But I had to, if not for me for them. They needed someone who was there to teach them and focus on them. I can't do or be that right now. I'm sharing this so you know that you are not alone.

So if you can't think of youself(and ((((you)))) are the most important person here by the way) right now, maybe it would help you to think of them. And if your principal isn't thinking of them then she just plain and simple isn't doing her job.

(((hugs)))

I hope things get better real soon:)
mel




Edited 1/11/2005 3:45 pm ET ET by mel_1025

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Avatar for svetlana1833
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2005
Tue, 01-11-2005 - 3:43pm

Considering how much time most of us spend at our jobs, it's no wonder they cause us grief! My case is even funnier because I work for a mental health organization. My supervisor knew I was going to counseling. I did really well for awhile, but you know how it is - things pile up and you start backsliding and before you even realize it, you're in the pit.

Last summer I got in the pit and didn't even really know it. Apparently I was being less than congenial to my coworkers. But instead of them asking me "are you all right?" it was, let's report Svetlana to her supervisor. I had a complete meltdown and almost quit right then. I was sitting there sobbing hysterically in my supervisor's office and she didn't even offer me a tissue. I said, look, I've been having problems lately.

And she said to me, "you're just using your depression as an excuse for your lousy attitude."

Oh, right. I'm sitting here in hysterics, which is not a usual state of mind for me, and she's accusing me of using it as an excuse. Whatever.

I did have my former psychologist (who unfortunately moved to another state) do an ADA review for me at my supervisor's request. She pointed out that there were management issues that needed to be addressed, not just my mental state. (If you think any of those management issues have been addressed, think again.) Anyhow, while some of her suggestions were largely ignored, I have been more open with my coworkers about when I'm not well, and they have been more sensitive to it. While it was a lousy situation, we have opened up the channels of communication a little more, and that seems to have helped.

Since we have access to the state's Employee Assistance Program, I was able to get six counseling sessions at no cost, so I did that.

In the meantime, my job is still boring, which is why I have time to post to discussion boards (lol).

I started graduate school last semester, and that helped me immensely, in having some intellectual activity. I'm like a border collie - if my brain ain't workin, I ain't happy, and when I ain't happy... well, you know the rest.

I did look for another job for about a year, but nothing came of it. I've been at my job long enough to have 4 weeks vacation, so I'm thinking I might want to keep that while I'm in graduate school. In the meantime, I'm still exploring employment opportunities at the university, because employees get a MAJOR tuition discount. I guess we'll see.

Good luck and hugs to all of you with lousy jobs.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2004
Fri, 01-14-2005 - 11:09am
Thank you for your kind words. Earlier this week I went ahead and handed in my resignation and they accepted it. I did not ask for a medical leave of absence which maybe I should have, but I am relieved now. I gave proper notice so am still there, and am scared about finding another job. Have been putting resumes out there, but I don't want to teach anymore. The principal is a very nice person, but I do think she could have given me some more support. I'm a specials teacher and felt very isolated. She knew what I was going thru back in Sept but never came down to check on me or see how I was doing except for one short observation (because a parent felt her child was getting bumped around in PE too much!). I had to ask her how I did. She said fine, I just did a few things all first year teachers do but I never met with her to find out what those things were. I feel like I did a decent job, but it is such a struggle every day. I guess I worked at my other job for so long and just could not adjust too well to teaching. I think I miss my old job too. I was there for 13 years. I just felt like maybe if I had some more support and was not left totally on my own that things may have turned out differently. Maybe I should have reached out more too, but it is uncomfortable for me to tell other people what I'm going thru if I don't know them that well. Anyway, I have resigned and feel like a loser right now, but I know things will get better. I'm sure I'm the gossip of the school right now! lol. After I resigned, I did check into maybe taking back and going on some medical leave, but basically was told by the union I had one week to retract the resignation and they need to go back to work at the end of that time. I did not think that was going to solve my problem so I did not pursue that. I am just going to leave at the end of Jan and move on to other things.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2004
Fri, 01-14-2005 - 4:25pm

I'm glad you were able to do what was right for you. Don't feel bad about not reaching out. I've worked where i work for 10 years; the staff is under 40 people and we are very close. I had trouble reaching out to very many people. only 2 in the end. I think it depends on how you feel, and when you feel so bad, it is just plain hard to talk about it. Don't be hard on yourself (I know easy to say). Just take care of you. I'm not sure what state you're in, but the principal should have been observing first year teachers more frequently than that, whether in the contract or not. It's just plain old good administrating. That's one of the first things I learned. You MBWA = manage by walking around. I'm sorry for all you've been through. Good luck looking for a job. What are you looking for now by the way? Please keep us posted on how you are doing both on the hunt and with how you are feeling. Everyone here is very supportive and will help as they can.

mel

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