Diagnosed Today

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2003
Diagnosed Today
2
Thu, 01-27-2005 - 10:50pm

I guess I kind of felt like I may be depressed, especially for the past year - I've just been so... blah... I can't focus, I don't feel like I'm accomplishing anything, and I seem to tear up over things that shouldn't bother me. It has been affecting my relationship, and my school life, and I should have gone in sooner but I honestly felt silly - I KNOW I have no reason to be sad, things are good! but I just can't seem to help it.

So, I went into the doctor last week for fatigue and concentration issues, she suspected depression but wanted a second opinion, which I got today. The second doctor says it's either depression or some sort of mood disorder that I can't remember the name of, he prescribed Prozac (the only one covered under my insurance), a small dose that he says he'll increase with time if it doesn't help. He also prescribed counselling sessions to help determine exactly what is wrong with me.

So, as of today I'm on Prozac and I don't know what to expect. I was treated for depression a long time ago, I was in my early teens, but I was on Zoloft then and I can't remember how I felt before or after taking it. I understand it's going to take a long time to start working, 4 weeks or so, but what then?

I've been this way so long, I can't remember who I am without this fog lingering over me, what if this IS me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2004
In reply to: mudgator
Thu, 01-27-2005 - 11:22pm

Hi...
I understand how you feel. Over the years of on & off again treatment I sometimes, during the off times, feel that it is maybe just how I am, also. Thing is for me I had that Ah Ha moment the first time on anti-depressants (prozac). It was like...oh...this is how I am supposed to feel or how others feel. The shades were lifted. Somehow we lose touch or the memory of feeling good, but it is still there,just hidden. I may never be the gal bopping around...but I can be much happier (that and be-bop gal quite frankly irritates me...lol).

Stick with the therapy and med. It takes time, for both. Hopefully Prozac will work for you too, if not they can try others. I went to my first visit with a new therapist today (haven't been in a couple years, and should have). It was tough, I cried more than I thought was possible, but I had quite a revelation today...and that makes it all worth it.

You say you have no reason to be sad. Well, you feel sad and don't discount that. Through therapy you can explore what's really happening there. This coming from the queen of denying my own feelings. It's quite a journey, but well worth it. Oh...and...Vent & keep on venting. (I'm starting my journaling tonight...homework!)

I wish you all the best!
Take Care
~ltsdove

 

"In short, all good things in life are wild and free."  ~Thoreau

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2005
In reply to: mudgator
Fri, 01-28-2005 - 12:41am
Hi....I know exactly how you feel...I didn't realize how many people felt the way I do until I found this site today...and started reading down through the msgs....and everytime I read something I kept saying "I've thought about that" or "I've felt like that"...your msg was almost like I wrote it myself....I went to get help about 3 months ago now...and I'm on my 3rd kind of meds...The others didn't help any....I've only been on this new one for a week now...so I don't know what will happen with this one...But I am determined to get better and I want to be happy again no matter how long it takes!! I hope you feel the same...
Take Care :)
Shelley