please listen anyone?
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| Tue, 02-08-2005 - 8:06am |
I am left with a depression since my last boyfriend vanished.
He was physicaly and verbaly abusive. Still I had a very very hard time breaking up with him and whenever I did (I cant count how often) I always took him back after a certain amount of time of being alone. All of this didnt make me depressed because I knew that there was someone out there who loved me and cared(at least I told myself that) for me.
Now I had to face it.
He left without goodbye and called me from another continent. He said he would be back in a couple of days. Than he called and said he would stay longer. I was angry and wanted to know where he was and what he does. He said if I dont behave the way he likes it he will never come back to me. He is never reachable at day or at night. When he calls me there is always streetnoise.
I am very sure he has an affair and is cheating on me. At the same time he is asking me to get married next week to him. And he already schedulted a date with the local court where I live.
I am depressed.
I cry every night. And I have a hard time going through my work days.
I have been trhough this before. My last fiancee left me the same way 2 weeks before the marriage. He 'disappeared' to the Bahamas for our schedulted marriage and never came back to me.
I went through hell.
I dont need that again.
I feel like I am dying.....
deep down inside I know there is destiny and its all going to turn out well. I just can not see it right now. I am blinded by pain. !!

Hi there
Im so sorry things are soo rough right now.
*hugs
I'm terribly sorry for the pain you're in.