Bad Day
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Bad Day
| Tue, 02-08-2005 - 8:28pm |
More teachers were cut today along with one of the school nurses and a director of PSR took a huge pay cut. I feel guitly because I am upset and I wasn't even planning to go back anyway, and some of these people need the job and I really don't. Yes---I am still upset because they are just throwing the music program that I have worked so hard on away. I am feeling very suicidal and have taken friday off with the intention of getting things in order. I did see my pdoc tonight ---but my therapist had to cancel due to her own health. They are talking about freezing rain for tomorrow so I am already worrying about it. I have no choice---if we have school I have to go. It's Ash Wednesday. I've got to take care of mass. Then I would like to come home and just froget everything.
Had enough whining? Debbie
Had enough whining? Debbie

Debbie, I'm so sorry about how things are going at school...that sounds like it must be hard on everyone, including you...there's no need to feel guilty! It's completely understandable for you to be upset when it seems like they're just throwing your program away. Even so, think of all the students you've taught over the years and how you've instilled your love of music in them...that will never be thrown away.
Please, please talk to your pdoc about how bad you're feeling if you haven't already...it's so important that you're open with him. I'm worried about you...when you say you're taking Friday off to "get things in order," is that in relation to your suicidal thoughts? If so, it's even more important that you talk to your pdoc and/or therapist, post here for support, do whatever it takes to make it through. We need you here, your children need you, your students (past and present) need you...you're an important part of so many people's lives, and you will continue to be even if your job changes.
Call me if you'd like to...please hang in there...you'll be in my thoughts this week.
Rose
Debbie: I say to HECK with it being Ash Wednesday and the school relying on you to be there for the music program, take care of YOU first, call you doctor, and I am really starting to think you need to go into the hospital, consider it debbie time, go in, chill out, you won't have to go to work, or pick up after the 2 males at home, go in, and take some time off for you, PLEASE do that for yourself.
I am sending you prayer and hugs, please hang in there, we ALL need you so very badly. Love, Josie.