im always so sad, nothing helps,
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| Mon, 11-09-2009 - 10:06am |
im always so very sad, i just dont know how much longer i can take it. ive been divorced for 6 yrs now, was in a ver loving relationship with a great guy, but then i blew it, like i do everything. im trying so desperately to get back with him, i know he still loves me very much hes just worried that i will hurt him again, and hes with someone he doesnt love, he cares about her but he doesnt love her, i just dont know what to do, i cant handle this anymore, all i do is cry, and i think about ending things just so i dont ruin anymore lives. i really do think that this world is better off without me. ive been to the doc and im on antidepressants but its not working, i have panic attacks, my heart races and i really feel like im crazy sometimes. ive been thinking so much about suicide the last couple of days. i just want the pain to go away, i dont want to be sad anymore, i dont want to cry anymore, i want to be normal again, like i was when i was with him. somebody please help, i have nowhere else to go, nobody understands how i feel and im afraid im going to do something really stupid really soon

If you are in danger, please seek help immediately by calling 911, your local authorities, or the Suicide Hotline, 1-800-273-TALK.
I'm so sorry that you're feeling so down.
tk301, if you are taking antidepressants and they are not working, tell your doctor and ask to try another medication.
Remember, you're not alone. Every one of us is lonely, so we have to support each other. Everyone feels like they're worthless and helpless sometimes, but take comfort in that lots of people feel that way, and if someone close to you said that, you'd surely say, "You're not worthless! There's so much good about you!" There are people who think that about you, even if you don't think it right now!
Sometimes when I'm feeling down or unappreciated, I read Cary Tennis's column at salon.com. He doesn't do any old advice column. . .he's very philosophical and kind. The world can be unkind, but there's definitely someone out there who's thinking about you, even a stranger like me. If you ever want to just write out a long letter that says all your troubles right now and know that someone will read it and respond, you can send it to me. My email is my username at gmail.
Hi! I read your post & am wondering how things stand? There is NO WAY that I will ever believe that you don't have value. There are ppl in your life who would be devastated by your death. You are a good person in a bad situation. If you were feeling better about yourself, I don't think you'd be talking about ending your life. This sounds like the depression talking. Our thoughts spiral ever downward. We cannot see anything good about ourselves because depression paints the world black. We are negative. We lose hope. Sadly, the depression tends to cloud our judgement & it's hard to concentrate & figure things out. Sometimes, it's best to allow others to help guide us in decisions. Please ask a trusted friend, your family or a health care professional to get you to the help you need.
We're talking about YOUR VERY LIFE! No matter how bad things are, suicide is permanent! NOONE in this community wants that to happen! If you're a person of faith, ask your Higher Power for peace. There is no guarantee that when we die, especially by our own hand, that life on the other side will be better for us. I know that it will NOT be better for those you leave behind. They will suffer the pain, sadness & guilt for their lifetime. Please do the right thing. Don't act on the thoughts. Depression is common & treatable. I cannot promise you that life will be a bed of roses. I can tell you, that you will get better. I did & many on the Suicidal Thoughts & Feelings board http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-bhsuicidesur/ can tell you about it. My T&P's are with you. GL & GBU! Keep in touch. We care. (((hugs))) jan