Hurting in my life.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2009
Hurting in my life.....
11
Wed, 11-25-2009 - 8:30pm

I'm not depressed, so I hope that you don't mind if I post here, but I am going through a period of my life where there is so much anguish.  Maybe someone here can offer some insight for me.


I feel like nothing is working out for me. I have no friends right now, any type of support I try to scrape up disappears before it even pans out and it's killing me. I have two kids, am a single mom and feel very alone. I try to make friends and it works out for awhile. Then somehow it disappears.


I know I said I was not depressed and I'm not, because I do enjoy life but if it wasn't for my children I don't know what I'd do. Does G-D even love me? I don't think so. He's never given me any person to love me, my friends are not consistent, every person in my life has used and left me. My two joys in my life are my kids.


As much as I look forward to things in life and work on them to make them better, I keep wondering where G-D is and what does he think of me. Where is the love in my life? I wish that there was a way to figure out these answers. I truly believe that people can heal their mistakes and create a beautiful life, but until I figure out what the problem is how can I heal it? I truly feel heartbroken and am mourning for a life that I want to create but need to fill this hole first.


But where is the love for me? Every day I wonder this and every day my life is filled with bitter pain. Please don't try to tell me I am depressed; generally I am a happy person, but the circumstances in my life are making me take a good look and wonder how I can fix this.


Please don't take what I said personally; I have nothing but love and compassion for people who are depressed and I don't mean any disrespect by saying that I am not, it's just that I know the symptoms and I know the bodily feeling that depression creates, and I know that that is not my problem at the moment, but my life situation is. Thank you for any help you can send my way. Happy Thanksgiving to all.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2009
Sat, 11-28-2009 - 1:24am
Have you tried getting involved in your community?

Pages