Does anyone ever get better?
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Does anyone ever get better?
| Wed, 02-03-2010 - 2:20pm |
I've been depressed and anxious, to one degree or another, since puberty. I've been on and off meds. I've had ups and downs. I've finally realized that I have to stay on medication if I want to feel better. After trying pristiq and finding out that, though it helped me, it raised my blood pressure to dangerous heights, my doctor put me back on Welbutrin but I had to start back on the lowest dosage. I see him in a couple of days and he will increase the dose. right now, I'm feeling better. At least I'm not suicidal and wanting to cry all day. But I am just numb and have no energy. I feel so hopeless about this illness. It seems like I have been fighting it for so long. It's like living in a pool of quicksand. My house is a mess. My finances are a mess. My kids need more attention and discipline. My two youngest just started therapy because they clearly have their own anxiety issues and I can't be the kind of mother that they need right now. I remember, during a good period in my life, that I was a good, maybe even excellent, mother but that seems like a lifetime ago. Does anyone ever get better? Will I ever feel normal? And what is normal, anyway? I just want to wake up with energy. I want to be able to clean my house and pay my bills and not feel like I am spinning my wheels all of the time.

I'm with you; I have felt that hopeless myself and still do sometimes.
My 2 cents is, I am now 54, have been depressed since at least 13, added anxiety disorder somewhere along the way, and I will always have it, like one always is a diabetic, or some other chronic disease.
Last saturday was awful, and I don't like those type of days, but I have a full time job, a happy marriage, active in church, and life goes on.
I too have been dealing with depression since about 13.