Does anyone ever get better?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2005
Does anyone ever get better?
4
Wed, 02-03-2010 - 2:20pm
I've been depressed and anxious, to one degree or another, since puberty. I've been on and off meds. I've had ups and downs. I've finally realized that I have to stay on medication if I want to feel better. After trying pristiq and finding out that, though it helped me, it raised my blood pressure to dangerous heights, my doctor put me back on Welbutrin but I had to start back on the lowest dosage. I see him in a couple of days and he will increase the dose. right now, I'm feeling better. At least I'm not suicidal and wanting to cry all day. But I am just numb and have no energy. I feel so hopeless about this illness. It seems like I have been fighting it for so long. It's like living in a pool of quicksand. My house is a mess. My finances are a mess. My kids need more attention and discipline. My two youngest just started therapy because they clearly have their own anxiety issues and I can't be the kind of mother that they need right now. I remember, during a good period in my life, that I was a good, maybe even excellent, mother but that seems like a lifetime ago. Does anyone ever get better? Will I ever feel normal? And what is normal, anyway? I just want to wake up with energy. I want to be able to clean my house and pay my bills and not feel like I am spinning my wheels all of the time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2009
Wed, 02-03-2010 - 3:25pm

I'm with you; I have felt that hopeless myself and still do sometimes.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2005
Wed, 02-03-2010 - 3:40pm
ha ha. I watch the bbc america show clean house to make myself feel better. We had a cleaning lady who came in once a week and that at least kept it looking decent. My dh insisted that we let her go because I'm not really working right now. It wasn't the money because we can afford it but he feels its not necessary. I might hire another one because the house itself depresses me when it's such a mess. The truth is, I just can't keep it up. sad but true.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999
Wed, 02-03-2010 - 6:43pm

My 2 cents is, I am now 54, have been depressed since at least 13, added anxiety disorder somewhere along the way, and I will always have it, like one always is a diabetic, or some other chronic disease.


Last saturday was awful, and I don't like those type of days, but I have a full time job, a happy marriage, active in church, and life goes on.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-23-2008
Tue, 02-09-2010 - 10:59am

I too have been dealing with depression since about 13.