Terrible, No Good, Very Bad DAY!!
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| Wed, 03-31-2010 - 9:16am |
Maybe I should rephrase that to say very bad WEEK!!
I'm glad to have a board like this to post on. Depression is not something that many people understand. Here's what's going on.
I am a SAHM with 4 kids. Ages 17, 13, 3 and almost 2. (the oldest 2 are of course at school all day) I've suffered from depressions since I was a teen. I've been on Pristiq for about 9 weeks now. I do think it's helping, but the last few days have felt awful.
I feel extrememly lonely and frustrated. I feel like I'm invisible. As long as i cook, clean, shop, chauffeur, be a secretary, telephone operator, dishwasher, laundry washer, house keeper etc....everything is fine, but as soon as I ask for help or need something I'm just a nag.
I've tried SO hard to raise happy, loving kids. but I feel so INVISIBLE. No one ever seems to understand that I might have needs and wants. As long as I just do and do, everyone else is happy, but as soon as I expect something, I'm the worst.
And it's not just my kids. Not that my husband every calls me a nag, but it's just the same.....as long as I'm doing everything and expect nothing, he's fine and happy.....I can be running around like a chicken with my head cut off and everyone still just does whatever they WANT and I just keep on going. I'm not the Energizer Bunny...I get tired, I get lonely....I need support and help and love too!!! Why is it that no one else can see this???
And if i bring it up...things get better for a little time, but nothing really changes.
I try and try to do little things for myself. I've lost over 45 lbs since I had my last baby. I walk and workout and try to eat right. I try to get enough sleep....but I still find that I just feel....empty. Lost. Invisible. Like I could disappear and the only thing my friends and familiy would notice is how there's no supper on the table, and no clean dishes or laundry and no food in the fridge, and that the house is dirty.
So today I feel at the end. I've cried twice this am. I just don't know how to make my family understand how I feel and what I'm going thru. I'm not a robot....i have feelings too!
I really truly feel like they do not put any value on me and what how much I do. That I can just keep going and going and going.....sometimes I need my emotional tank filled up too.....and feel like there's no one here to do it!!!
Any advice would be appreciated, but please...I don't need more about how I need my kids to help out etc....I've been trying for years....taking away privledges etc....it lasts for a few days but then back to same old same old.
I just need some emotional support right now.
thanks

















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((HUGS)) Don't worry, I am not going to tell you to get the kids to do more, sounds like you tried that already.
Well the last twelve days, my dh has worked at his aunts from about 7 am until anywhere from 9 pm unil 1 am.
Do the younger two children take a nap still?
Well dh is supposed to be done at his aunts.
I am sorry you are having a hard time.
Well looks like dh is back to work now for the season, so the things that I wanted to get done before he went back arent' going to happen.
How are you today?????
I am glad your parents will be there this weekend to keep you company and hopefully give you a little break :)
I don't think we even talked about your depression, did we?
Hi there,
No doubt, being the mother of four active children is tough work! I'm exhausted just reading your post, LOL. But seriously, I know you said you're looking for emotional support but are you sure that's really all you need right now? Emotional support may only help you focus on the problem rather than provide you with much opportunity to find a solution.
As I read through the entire thread, it got me to thinking about your situation a little more. It could be that you're
I've been depressed since I was a teenager, but always seemed able to manage it on my own.
Gail....I dont' have time to respond to all this....I want to look at it more.
I'm looking forward to doing it.
thanks
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