Lost pawz, all. I'm sorry. *Trig*

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-03-2003
Lost pawz, all. I'm sorry. *Trig*
1
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 4:08pm
I'm sorry about my reply Lostpawz, and all that read it.

It hurt for me to recall all that, but maybe I needed to do that to move on, I'm just sobbing, and feeling like such a fool for posting that about my experiences, I'm sorry.

If only life was easy, if only.

Maybe starving myself, and killing myself with Overdoses and blades will be the best option, maybe I can escape this crap hole I am supposed to call a life.

I'm 19, and I sound like a freaking nutcase when I talk about some of the stuff I have experienced. ughh.

Hating yourself, bringing yourself to near death, why did I do it?

Why did I think starving myself, or taking so many pills would help me, maybe it will help me, maybe I can just escape all the freaking numbers, all the crap.

Past 6 months, I have been in A and E, in casualty, 18 times, all from huge overdoses on painkillers, tubes down throats, IV lines, Charcoal, so much...

Maybe I should have not been found and forced to hospital, maybe I would be in a damn grave and no longer thinking of food, numbers or fear.

Ughh, I'm sorry guys.

This is a low night for me, I'm sorry. I don't mean to trigger.

I'm sorry. Just ignore that fat whale of a girl called Kate, UGHHH!!

Kate

x

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 6:05pm
Kate dear, you have got to stop being so hard on yourself. I love and worry about your greatly. You know that suicide is not the answer, so many people love you whether you think so or not. You have so much to offer people, you are so caring and kind. I know how tough this is for you, but you have to keep fighting. You can't let the old devil win, you are better than him. He is making you think that you are worthless, but God thinks you are wonderful and he wants you to turn to him for help. I am not trying to get ultra religious on you, but I just want you to know that you are worth it. You are a good person and you are not fat. You are beautiful and giving and loving, so keep fighting with all you have girl, I am behind you 100%!! Love you, sharon