Pregnant and Bulimic . Any experience???

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2003
Pregnant and Bulimic . Any experience???
6
Fri, 01-16-2004 - 1:28pm
Hi,

I'm 16 weeks pregnant and actively bulimic. As you as know it's impossible to cure myself just because of my current circumstances. Does anyone have any info they can share on this subject?

Thanks

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 01-16-2004 - 6:40pm

Hi,


I don't have any personal experience but you might want to check www.somethingfishy.org. And you might get some posts here, too. I hope things will work out for you. Please post any time you need to.

Love & hugs, Kristina


The opinions I have expressed here are from my own experience and are not intended as medical advice or to take the place of your own physician's advice.

Love & hugs, Kristina

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2003
Sun, 01-18-2004 - 4:36pm
Impossible, no, but unlikely, yes. But it doesn't matter. You can do anything if you need to enough. You MUST think of the child inside. I ache as I write to think of what could happen.

I am a strong believer that we are often best-equipped to care for ourselves, better than any other person (God excluded ;)) could. I truly believe that you know how to make better choices and stop your behavior. But you have to let yourself do that. If ever there is a time when you must surrender your pride and help yourself, it is now. You know best what you need.

You see, in the end, it all comes down to this: you just stop. Because you have to. Because life is too precious. Because you're tired and you don't want to anymore. Because there is slush in the street, a book on your nightstand, and a smile on a small, pajama'ed girl in the kitchen.

It doesn't matter how you do it. You already know. You've known all along. But it's too easy to fall back on the old mantra: I CAN'T just stop. It is true in some ways, most of all because you make it true.

So what do you need to do? You know best. If it were me, I would be finding the right professionals (I didn't say helping yourself meant doing it alone...), eating the way I know I should, and doing the things that crowd out the eating disorder (things I love, things that ground me in relationships, things that make me feel taken care of, things that put God first). I am being vague only because I have a feeling you've heard these things before: Call a friend! Take a bath! Write down your feelings! And so on. And you will do those things. But the mistake we usually make is refusing to see HOW those things could help. When I want to purge, there is no way in hell I'm going to start a bath instead. It all depends on the thing that comes before the desire to purge and before the bath: the commitment to do whatever it takes to keep you on the right path. That way, you don't have to fear the desire when it comes. You just do something, anything, to carry you until it subsides.

I have said too much. I want so badly for your baby to have a safe and loving pregnancy. BABY. Remember. You have two babies now: the child you bear, and yourself. Take care of both, selflessly.

You will be in my prayers so much, even if we never hear from you again.

All my love and hope and strength (which are not big),

and All of God's (which are SO big),

Starfish

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2003
Sun, 01-18-2004 - 8:04pm
Please Please read this post....I was actively bulemic (very much so) when I found out I was already 3 mos pregnant. I hadn't missed the period because I wasn't having them much anymore anyway. It was very hard to stop myself. It wasn't until I was about six months along that I truly felt I had life in me. I felt him growing and moving. I waited that long to completely kick my bulemia. I had gotten better and stopped alot of my habits but I still did take laxatives occasionally and would eat a good meal then gorge and promptly throw it up until I saw the parts of the healthy food then I would stop. It was like I thought I was ok because I was leaving some of the healthy foods down. I know that now it sounds crazy but it almost made sense to me at the time. Even though the first time I felt my baby I completely turned around, I had already done some damage. I quickly developed toxemia, (high blood pressure when pregnant) so bad that I could barely make a quick walk to the bathroom without getting dizzy. I ended up on 1/2 day bed rest at 6 1/2 months and full bed rest at 7 and 1/2 months. I swole up so big I couldn't see my ankle or wrist bones. All I did to keep from getting fat had left me looking flushed out and swollen from head to toe. I felt like a complete moron. I prayed and cried and prayed the whole time I was on bed rest that I hadn't hurt my baby. I ended up having to be induced early because my blood pressure was just staying up and at 8 mos, I delivered a small but HEALTHY baby boy. And the funny thing is, that all the while I was praying, I prayed that he be healthy and jokingly, I asked god to give him my big brown eyes so that everyone would know he was my baby. AND....GOD GAVE ME A HEALTHY BABY WITH BIG BROWN EYES. Of course he looks like my husband in every other aspect but by GOD he got my eyes and everyone notices it. Ha Ha. Anyway...I say all this because I think that it was by the grace of God that I was spared and that my child was spared. My doctor did say that my body just couldn't handle the pressure of the eating disorder along with growing a baby also. So think of it this way...you could possibly die while trying to have your baby and miss out on SOOOOO much love or you could end up taking care of a sick child who just possibly got that way because of YOU. And I personally could not live that way. I ended up having to shed 45 pounds and it took me a year and a half to get it completely off. I was completely "goo goo" over my son, so that helped. It seemed like that flabby stomach wasn't quite so important when he would light up at the sight of me. AHHHHH!!!! Well...that little mess is now 5 and he still makes me melt with his hugs and "i love you Mama"'s. I still can't believe I ever came that close to hurting him or missing out on his life. You can loose the weight eventually, and besides it is more likely to stay off if you do it slowly and correctly. I have still have managed to stay within my weight goal (plus or minus 5) ha ha. PS...dispite how embarressed you are...you really need to tell your obgyn about your disorder. It helps them to know ahead of time that they need to watch your heart rate and blood pressure
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2003
Tue, 01-20-2004 - 3:24pm
I am a recovered bulimic and almost six weeks pregnant. I was in recovery prior to my pregnancy, so I cannot relate to "actively" participating in an ED during pregnancy, but I can understand the emotions and worries. Even though you cannot "cure" yourself due to your "circumstance" you can and need to get help ASAP. There is another life in the balance, a life that depends upon you for all of its nourishment. Your doctor needs to know in order to treat you and the baby. I would imagine a serious concern with your vitamins, as well as your blood pressure and potassium levels. If you can't tell your Dr., does your SO/DH know? Sometimes that's a first step to getting help.

There is a "Pregnant with an ED" message board on parentsplace that has several women who are either still pregnant or have already dealt with a pregnancy and an ED. I know I still have a long way to go in my recovery, and I have my moments where I feel like caving in, but my perspective is so different. I no longer am the only one that matters, I have a responsibility to my baby and to God to take care of myself.

I pray that your baby is healthy and strong. Please get help...you will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Love,

Jennifer

http://mattsmommy.blogspot.com/
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Fri, 01-23-2004 - 5:13pm
hi my name is april. i understand where you are coming from on this. i am actively bulimic and yet pregnant myself. the only piece of advice i can give you is what was given to me. take it slow. it is going to be hard but anything worth working on is going to be hard. i know how hard this is because of the fact i am going through it also. i hope that if you need anything you can know that i will be here for you if i can. i check the messege board everyday and will respond as soon as i get the messenge. take care of yourself and think about the innocent little angel inside of you that needs you to be strong for them as well as yourself.

april
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Fri, 01-23-2004 - 11:57pm
i know that it is hard to overcome the disorder, but i was there when i was pregnant with my son who is now seven and will soon be celebrating his eighth birthday. the thing that got me to stop was the thought of what it was doing to my child within me. your body will kill the child if you continue to take the actions you are taking. your body will eat the child and even if you some how carry the child it can cause great birth defects that you may not be prepared to handle. I am so thankful that i was able to overcome the disorder in order to protect my child. he is such a wonderful boy and i love him more than i thought possible. i am very proud of my child and i hope that one day you can look on this child within you and say the same thing. i hope all goes well for you and that i may have been able to help a little. just remember to keep trying to do what is best for your child and take one day at a time.