Checking in

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2003
Checking in
1
Tue, 04-06-2004 - 4:46pm
I have just popped back in and saw Kristina's post for updates...The good news is that I have remained binge/purge free for well over six months now. I feel as though such a weight has been lifted from my heart and mind. I am now 17 weeks pregnant, and we found out last week that we are going to have a little boy! My DH is over the moon...we've named him Matthew Charles.

The bad news is that I was diagnosed with breast cancer two weeks ago and have subsequent surgeries and Doctor's appts. They have caught it early and my prognosis is excellent, but the last two weeks have been a living hell. I am so glad that I was not practicing my ED and I could deal with this crisis in a healthy way. I have a mastectomy scheduled for next week, at which time they will remove the right breast. After the baby is born (sometime in late Aug. or Sept.) I will go back and have the left breast mastectomy and reconstruction on both. The baby has made it through two surgeries with flying colors and my Doctors expect that it will be no different with my upcoming surgery.

I have done a lot of soul searching since my diagnosis as well as wondering why I have been diagnosed with cancer at 27 and pregnant, no less. I have been such a negative, self-involved person my entire life, which stemmed mainly from my low self-esteem. I have not allowed God to fully enter my life, nor lean on Him when I need it. I don't know if I would have been lucky enough to realize these things had I not been diagnosed with cancer. I feel as though I have been given a great gift--an insight at 27 that many people don't realize until much later in life, if at all. I am lucky that I was persistent enough for the cancer to be diagnosed early. When I was in the midst of my ED, I would not have been as proactive with the Doctors since I hated that anyone might find out my secret. Things that I used to put so much stock in don't seem to matter as much anymore, and things that I sort of ignored or took for granted mean a great deal. I can tell you right now that while I still have body image issues, the size of my pants means very little at this moment.

I'll try to pop in now and again with updates...

Best to everyone,

Jennifer

http://mattsmommy.blogspot.com/
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2004
In reply to: au1222
Tue, 04-06-2004 - 4:56pm

(((Jennifer)))


I am in shock and awe. Wow. Best of luck to you with your next surgery. I can't imagine. And being pregnant on top of it. My thoughts are with you and your little one.