New here...frustrated and need advice

Avatar for sherri51296
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
New here...frustrated and need advice
4
Thu, 07-08-2004 - 4:04pm
Well, I'm not sure where to start. I am 31 and have a 5mo. DD and a 3.5 yr DD. While I was pregnant with my 5mo. old, I developed a mild form of bulemia. I developed a sugar addiction and would binge on sugar then throw it up. That led to binging in general. I never threw up basic meals, just the extra stuff I know I shouldn't eat, but wanted to. I thought I would stop after I had the baby, but I didn't. Now I see a therapist. I have managed to stop binging and throwing up for the most part, but I am simply obsessed with food and how I look. I work out 5 times a week very intensely. I am trying to cut out sugar completely in order to break the addiction. I am nursing my baby so I get very hungry but I am eating pretty healthy. However, I am having trouble losing the weight an most especially my tummy. I am extremely frustrated and a little obsessed about it. I want to know how I can stop being obsessed. How do you stop thinking about it? Also, something that is wierd is that I will do fine eating healthy and small meals all morning through the lunch hour, but then in the afternoon I easily lose control and snack too heavily and then eat too much for dinner. It's like I don't have the right instincts or chemicals in my body to tell me to stop eating. When I get full, I want to eat more instead of less.

Does anybody have any thoughts or advice?

Sherri

Sherri
expecting baby girl#4 on 9/9/09
mom to Savana (8), Trinity (5) and Miranda (3)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2004
Thu, 07-08-2004 - 8:59pm
Hi Sherri, nice to meet you and glad you're here.

Maybe you tend to eat more at night because you aren't eating enough during the day. I find that if I eat two decent meals for breakfast and lunch, and have a snack in there somewhere when I'm hungry, I don't end up bingeing at night as often. A major cause of bingeing is being really, really hungry, like from restricting :)

You might also find that eating normal meals that fill you up will help with your sugar cravings. It's hard to want a huge bowl of ice cream when you're already full from a nice dinner.

I'm just starting recovery, so I still think about my body and size a lot. One of the things I'm trying to do is just accept the feeling instead of bingeing to numb it or starve to "fix" it. I'm giving my patience a good workout, but I know it's healthier than beating myself up.

I'm out of time right now and have to go, but I want to encourage you to keep posting here!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 07-08-2004 - 10:33pm

Hi Sherri,


I think you are definitely on the right track and things will eventually change. We typically want recovery to happen overnight, but unfortunately that's not the way it works. Try to focus on the improvements you have made already, like not bingeing and purging anymore, and give yourself some credit. I know you want to loose weight but that takes time, too, especially after having a baby.


Cutting out sugar is a great idea and after a while you stop craving it, but you want to make sure you get enough calories from nutritious foods (especially since you are breastfeeding). I agree with hemmy that you might get hungry in the evening because you don't eat enough during the day. Sometimes there is a sense of loss, too, when we realize we are approaching the last meal of the day

Love & hugs, Kristina

Avatar for sherri51296
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 07-09-2004 - 4:49pm
Thank you for your feedback. I don't know if hormones play a part in how I'm feeling/thinking, but certainly having a baby has been the trigger in all this. Because I have felt thin and fit before, I know what it feels like and I just want to be that way again so bad. And I am frustrated that it is taking so long and that it's such hard work. Sometimes it's still hard for me to believe that I have actually developed an eating disorder...I NEVER thought I would be in this position...and it just makes me angry with myself.

I will keep coming here. Thanks again!

Sherri

Sherri
expecting baby girl#4 on 9/9/09
mom to Savana (8), Trinity (5) and Miranda (3)

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-23-2004
Fri, 07-09-2004 - 10:18pm
I almost always throw up the foods I shouldn't eat.. I mostly eat salads, and that keeps my weight up including all that I drink.. I mostly only drink and eat salads.