I'm new to all of this

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2004
I'm new to all of this
1
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 6:32pm
My 18 year old son has a friend that we've known for many years,about 5 years ago she disappeared from our lives only to reappear a year ago. She is now a member of our family again,eating most of her meals with us. When she first came by I thought she was awfully thin and as she spent more and more time with us I started watching for signs of purging after meals, I haven't seen any. The girl has now confided in my son that she was treated for an eating disorder 2 years ago and is now "cured".What bothers us is that even though she seems to be eating and not purging she is terribly thin and has a very distorted opinion of her body. She's around 5'10" and weighs around 115 lbs yet she doesn't like to go to the pool because she "looks so fat" in her bikini. As I understand eating disorders you are never completely cured, it's like being an alcoholic,you may be a non drinking alcoholic but once an alcoholic you'll always be an alcoholic. The way this girl sees herself seems more drastic than that though. She seems to still have some sort of problem if she sees herself as fat. I try to fix a lot of nutricious low fat meals so that she'll eat even though she percieves herself as fat but I don't know how else to help. She comes from a troubled family, was kicked out of her mother'sand is living with a family friend so there is no one there that can advise me on this. Can anyone help me,tell me how to handle this?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2004
Mon, 08-23-2004 - 12:33pm

I'm surprised no one has replied to this message.


I just wanted to tell you that I think you're so sweet to be concerned and that this girl is lucky to have you and your son as friends. The most you can do for her is be there for her, support her, and love her. That's what she needs right now.


Check out www.somethingsfishy.com. There's a section there for friends/family of those with ED. My boyfriend printed them out and read them this weekend and said that it helped him a lot to understand what was going on with me.