can you have more than one?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
can you have more than one?
2
Fri, 09-17-2004 - 12:30pm


Hello everyone..

I am still waiting to find out info on a group session from my therapist but she has been swamped wioth other clients so thats okay, I have been researching on my own dont know if it is helping or not cause I have read stories that have given me ideas on how to not eat..lso I think I will end the research for now..

I have now gone back to my hardly eating thing and if I do eat I vomit which I know is not good I can feel my throat getting scratchy which is a sign that I am out of control..

I can not even eat an apple with out getting it out of me I havent told my therapist yet I get afraid at times cause when I speak it then it becomes real at least typing it here doesnt verbalize it therefore to me it isnt real..

I havent lost weiht at least I feel like I havent I was looking at myself in my full length mirrir last night and I noticed that on my right side I have a little more fat than on my left side and I just kept looking at it at times I wish I had the guts to cut off things like that but then I would have a scar.

I am still in my size 3 pants which I dont like I hope to be smaller before I go for my check up in november my doc wont say my weight out loud but if I keep up then maybe I wont mind hearing it ..

sorry for writting this I just need to vent and besides my therapist there is no one for me to turn to but you all.

Thanks for letting me vent this out.

Erin

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2003
Sun, 09-19-2004 - 4:59pm

Hi Erin,


As you know venting is good for you, so vent away! Honey everything you wrote touches my heart. Well except the purging (I haven't thrown up in 14 years and I can't make myself, I've scratched up my throat trying...).

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 6:28am

Hi Erin,


I know what you are going through is hard but you are not alone. Many of us either now or in the past have exeperienced the same. The thing to remember is that it can get better if you want it to. It will take some hard work, but the reward is amazing. Just don't give up and come and vent any time you need to.

Love & hugs, Kristina


The opinions I have expressed here are from my own experience and are not intended as medical advice or to take the place of your own physician's advice.

Love & hugs, Kristina