It's bad right now.....
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It's bad right now.....
| Mon, 01-23-2006 - 5:47am |
The bulimia has kicked in full force again. I know it's because I gained 20 pounds on my trip home. The pounds are almost back off but now I have to "quit" the behavior again. I am lying to my hubby telling him I am not purging and I have never done that before. It's like when I came out of "remission" it took a horrible more hard core stance. I am still eating what is on the menu plan for me but can't seem to reconcile that it is ok to eat food again without purging. I don't ever want to go back to in patient treatment so I have to reconcile this myself. I guess admitting it here is my first step. Now if I can just make that next step and stop the behavior!
With Much Regret,
Julie


(((Julie)))
No regrets, ya hear?
~Diana~
Hi, I don't post often, but I just wanted to say that I know exactly how you feel. I'm recently married, 4 months, and I'm kind of going through the same thing. I was fine for a while, 2.5 years with occasional purging--once every few months, and otherwise eating healthy, but after spending Christmas with my in-laws I started up with my old habits. I feel horrible lying to my husband, I've been sneaking around, making excuses... I'm 24 years old and I started this whole thing when I was 13, I just want it to be over. I'm just scared, over the past 3 weeks I've started lowering my daily calories, making excuses as to why I don't need to eat (x), and I've purged once a week.
My husband is a trained chef. When I met him he worked in a restaurant, he doesn't do that anymore, but he still cooks like a chef at home. Isn't that funny? I married a professional chef! Of course it makes perfect sense.
Do you have foods that trigger your behavior? I find that I do. The only way, I think, I was able to have such infrequent purges in the 2.5 years before I started this whole thing up again, is by avoiding the foods that trigger me. Of course that's really hard, but it's the only advice I have right now and it's something I'm trying to do.
Hi karrlii and welcome.
I wonder what it was about the in-law visit that triggered your behaviors this time --
Two and a half years with occasional purging?
~Diana~
Karrlii,
Thanks for letting me know I am not alone!
I hope things are getting better for you.
I am still not doing well and have really been afraid to come to the board because I don't want to be a negative influence. I need a therapist but can't afford one right now while hubby is out of work. I have been able to keep a couple of meals
Follow me to the DID/MPD
(((Julie)))
You do
~Diana~
I just can't get a grip on this. Last night I ate after I took
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(((hugs))) keep trying...
~Diana~
Follow me to the DID/MPD
About some people doing it without meds:
~Diana~
Topiramate is the generic for Topomax -- would help with the cost.
~Diana~