semi bulimic?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2005
semi bulimic?
6
Tue, 03-07-2006 - 4:00pm

Hi everybody,

Im new here, but have browzed the site a few times. Let me introduce myself; Im a happy, educated, 21 year old lass with a good job, good looks, a good family/circles of friends etc, trouble is im a part time purger. I purge simply to maintain my weight, I like to eat alot sometimes and dont want the excess fat on my body that would come with it. Id say I purge maybe 2/3/4 nights out of 7, and I dont even eat masses of foods on these occasions, I just think right if I get rid of that ill feel/be nice and slim, keep myself trim. I do complain about my weight, and my friends/family yell what are you talking about girl, but for sure i do have flabby parts on my body, but I do wonder if maybe i see things worse than they are...but doesnt everybody do that? I dont really see it as a deep psychological problem as it is just to maintain myweight and it isnt in an extreme fashion, though lol i guess some would think the occasional purge is extreme. If I didnt purge for a week I wouldnt feel terrible, and when I do alot of exercise I really dont feel the need to purge as I feel i deserve my food, as in my body can take the food without gaining weight. Maybe I just kid myself on this is no big deal, butit causes me no unhappiness, and I am truelly a happy gal, yes even deep down inside. Does anyone understand my predicament? You might all jump to the conclusion or more solution, just do lots of exercise, which yes i could, and i do do to an extent, its just ive just recently bought a new flat and am living alone for first time, and its that much easier just to be sick just for the sake of it. I would NEVER, and trust me on this, begin purging more than once a day, as in purge my lunch or whatever, hence i refer to myself as a part timer, im just wondering myself what is kind of going on with me lol, and writing it and hopefully hearing response may give me better understanding. Please no one say im in denial, I admit i do it part time, just offer me your opinions if you have anything to say. I should probably point out my sister was bulimic, for the exact same reason as me it seems, infact it was her that gave me the idea, not that she insisted, but the family became aware thats what she did, and i thought, hey i could do that to control my weight too. She is 'supposedly' stopped it now, but I know she hasnt!!

Anyway, ive talked enought

I welcome all responses

BB XX

Avatar for schitz
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2004
In reply to: bakerbrown
Wed, 03-08-2006 - 1:18pm

BB-


I'd say that you could be a part time purger as you put it and still be bulimic. I don't know exactly what the requirements are, or fit under the ED-NOS heading like me. I purge even less than you (like once a month, although I did 7 times out of 10 days in the hospital). Don't take this as a diagnosis. I am not here for that. But I just wanted to let you know that I purge

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-14-2006
In reply to: bakerbrown
Wed, 03-08-2006 - 3:09pm
Hi! I read your story and your story was basically my story about 1 year ago. I began as a part timer and would simply purge anything I felt that I ate extra just to maintain the magical number on the scale. I used the purging, counting calories, and extreme excercising to keep the magical number on the scale. I think somewhere late last summer my body began craving the foods I was restricting and I began binging and purging. I believe my thought process was like" hey, I am going to purge anyway, I might as well really enjoy myself and eat the candy bar I usually don't eat.)" So I began small and worked my way up where I began to hate myself and now I probably am addicted to these binges. I am trying to change my behavior without help other than this message board but I think I will soon need outside help. I have good days and bad days.
Honestly, no purging is healthy. If you can't stand what you ate and how it may have affected your body you need to figure out why. I hope you can stop this before you progress to worse behavior. If I could go back a year I certainly would try to do things differently.
Lots of Luck.
Laurie
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2005
In reply to: bakerbrown
Wed, 03-08-2006 - 3:32pm

Hi there,

Thank you for all your responses, much appreciated but as yet I dont think I have any better undestanding, other than, at present, it isnt a big problem. You seem to be suggesting it could get worse, which yes of course it could,but I am a pretty self controlled person and dont wish it to head in that path and also dont even wish to partake in it that much to take it to any extreme. You seem to be suggesting it could pregress that way naturally, which i accept, but having been made aware of this fact, could infact act as a preventative measure. I dont exercise in extreme fashions i wanted to point out as it seems someone got that impression - i actually LOVE exercising, love the gym, love running, such a feel good, such good exercise! And i dont do it with the midset..im gonna burn all this fat, im just in the healthy routine of doing it!

Thanks again

BB XX

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: bakerbrown
Fri, 03-10-2006 - 6:23am

Hi BB,


If you are purging, then you do have a problem. Whatever the cause, purging is not good for you and the fact that you are doing does mean that you have a problem, whether you like it or not. And I'm betting that somewhere, a part of you is not liking this at all - otherwise you wouldn't be here. It might not seem like a bit problem to you, but it could easily snowball into one. Yes, you've heard the stories and Glow has shared hers with you, but our tendency as a human being is to say that we'll never go down that path because we know better and we're strong, etc... then wake up realizing that we're there and we've got a huge problem on our hands.


I suggest that you go see your primary caregiver and talk about the purging, and go from there. Yes, I've heard you say that you are happy, successful, etc and I believe you but one doesn't exclude the other, you know. If you don't have an eating disorder, then ask to see a nutritionist so that you can learn healthy eating habits, because purging is just not the solution to your weight concerns.


Tell us what you've decided to do, and please come back to tell us how you are doing!




iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2005
In reply to: bakerbrown
Fri, 03-10-2006 - 12:50pm

Hi there,

Im afraid my purging is simply a means to control my weight, but i gotta say i havent purged for days, and have been pigging out a bit lol, but you seee it wasnt behaviour that came naturally to me, eg say begin calorie counting, leading onto starving..leading onto binge/purging, i didnt have a subtle path that brought me to my current situation. I seen my big sis, looking good and slim, and just thought hey i could do that too, and i have done! As I said i havent done for days as have been hectic moving into this new flat, so many visitors!!! And maybe ill make the conscious decision to try and do it less. Another dinner party tonight, so no opportunity to purge, and im happy with that! Must go get ready!

have a fab weekend all of you

BB XX

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
In reply to: bakerbrown
Sat, 03-11-2006 - 11:54am

Hi there, BB,


I'm sorry it took so long for me to get to your post -- my computer's been in the shop so I have been unavailable!


No one here is qualified to tell you whether or not you have a problem.

 

 

~Diana~