Do you ever...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Do you ever...
10
Tue, 05-16-2006 - 8:04am

Do you ever apologize to yourself...



  • when you've been particularly harsh towards your own self?

  • when you doubted yourself?

  • after you beat yourself up?

Do you ever thank your body for being such a patient and strong vessel, for sustaining you through good and bad, happiness and sadness? For being such a good and constant companion?


 


 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
In reply to: libelulle
Tue, 05-16-2006 - 5:33pm

Oh heck, Poppy, why didn't you just put QOTW at the beginning of that??!!!

 

 

~Diana~

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
In reply to: libelulle
Tue, 05-16-2006 - 11:11pm

LOL... I didn't think of that!


I know that body as a vessel and companion is a loaded question, and I hesitated a lot before posting here. It was inspired by a guided imagery CD I was listening to a few weeks ago, and it struck me that I never thought of thinking of my body like that. Perhaps a new way of thinking about our body might help us in our healing? Just an idea... What does everyone think?


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
In reply to: libelulle
Tue, 05-16-2006 - 11:21pm
Do you ever apologize to yourself...

  • when you've been particularly harsh towards your own self?
    Er... no. But I do have very lively discussions between my selves. It's a bit like the devil and angel discussions in cartoons. Both are arguing with each other, and I'm in the middle, listening. It's interesting.


  • when you doubted yourself?
    Yes. And I do try to not doubt myself after that, but I realize that there's a pattern there I have to break.

  • after you beat yourself up?
    Funnily, yes. When I'm harsh with myself I don't, but after I've beaten myself up over something, I do. And I'm nice to myself afterwards, too.

Do you ever thank your body for being such a patient and strong vessel, for sustaining you through good and bad, happiness and sadness? For being such a good and constant companion?
Yes, I have, a couple of times. As a survivor of sexual abuse, my body and I have an interesting relationship. There are times I hide it, as though my body were the cause of the abuse. There are times I flaunt it, because I want to celebrate the fact that it's a (relatively) beautiful body. There have been times I've not been nice towards it, when I was battling some problems. Now that I'm older, our relationship is easier. We're more at ease with one another.


Edited to correct typos :-)





Edited 5/17/2006 3:04 am ET by libelulle
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
In reply to: libelulle
Wed, 05-17-2006 - 12:06pm

Yes, body as our temple ... like it says in the bible.


When I was actively bulimic, I felt so guilty when I would think of this, because at that time,

 

 

~Diana~

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
In reply to: libelulle
Wed, 05-17-2006 - 12:24pm

Typos?

 

 

~Diana~

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
In reply to: libelulle
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 2:55am

I just realized something the other day: I really don't have a good and objective idea of how I look. Yes, I do realize that to a certain extent, this is a very common experience, going from moderate to extreme (those who have body dysmorphic disorder for example).


This is probably a signal that I ought to hit the yoga mat again on a regular basis. Not that it greatly changes things, but at least it does give me a way to feel at ease with the way I am.


It's much easier to blame everything of women. A lot of men have this virgin/whoe complex embedded somewhere in their brains, and I bet there is a female equivalent or variation

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
In reply to: libelulle
Fri, 05-19-2006 - 11:25pm

It was best when I was in school.

 

 

~Diana~

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
In reply to: libelulle
Sat, 05-20-2006 - 2:33am

Do you realize that there's a man out there who doesn't understand why he hasn't found the love of his life, just because he hasn't found you? It's soon gonna be time for you to start going out again. I know, the dating scene is a huge pain in the behind, and I've also been procrastinating (my latest excuse is that since I can't snog due to my braces, I might as well wait until the braces come off. Yes, it has been pointed out to me that it's a very lame excuse).


What I don't want is the casual dating thing. I've done that for the past few years. The last time I was in a serious relationship was 6 years ago (eep! that's a long time!). It took us a year to really break up (sigh), and then I went through a series of casuals and flings because I really didn't want to be in a relationship. Now I'm nearly ready again. It's scary, though. When you love someone you become oh so very vulnerable.


Tell me about your music. I'm really interested in your music. Have you ever composed anything for piano?


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
In reply to: libelulle
Sat, 05-20-2006 - 11:20am

Piano is the first thing I wrote for, when I was ten.

 

 

~Diana~

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
In reply to: libelulle
Sat, 05-20-2006 - 9:33pm

I am in total