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Others watching me...
| Sun, 12-10-2006 - 12:50pm |
Its so annoying how others are always pressuring me to eat. When I say Im not hungry, or do not have an appetite, I dont need the judgement and really its just making me less likely to want to eat with them because I feel like they are monitoring every bite I take. My boss has even gone as far as buying me lunch, when I say I dont want it.

It's really tough when we feel pressured to eat. Sometimes people don't even have to say anything for me to feel the pressure. I know that sometimes I feel others pressure me and it's really me pressuring me because that's what I think they are thinking. We are not mind readers. Just as I cannot know what others are thinking about my eating, others cannot know what you are thinking about your eating. They are probably just trying to do what's best for you (probably if they know you have an eating disorder) or they may just be trying to be polite and helpful (your boss maybe?). For those who know you have an eating disorder tell them it's not helpful and will juust make you more defensive and want to eat less and for those who don't, continue to politely refuse their offers if you aren't hungry and thank them for the offer. But are you really not hungry at these times or is it the ED voice that's telling you not to eat? Do you agree with ED? Guess what...you have to disobey that voice and eat anyway. I'm not saying that you have to eat a huge meal...baby steps, just have something that you are comfortable with. Another thing...is part of the problem not liking to eat in front of others? I have that problem too. Both when you are not hungry but know you should eat and in situations when you have to eat in front of others you have to do "mechanical eating"...go into automatic and not think about it, just do it.
Well I hope something I said helped. If I'm way off the mark tell me.
I know what it's like to feel sick when you eat. I had to force myself to eat for a long time.
I hope that you are healthy. Do you see a doctor regularly?
If that's always how you've eaten is it driven by habit or fear of gaining weight? Or something else?