How is everyone doing?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2006
How is everyone doing?
5
Wed, 04-18-2007 - 1:21pm

It's been quiet around here lately.


How is everyone doing? Are you feeling good? Are you struggling? Have you been good to yourself lately? Do you someone to just listen? Remember, that every little positive or good thing is a step forward. And remember, that sometimes letting it all out can help.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2003
Wed, 04-18-2007 - 1:39pm

I have been lurking - hiding is more like it I guess. When I am struggling, I withdraw. I don't know if it is the cold and dreary weather, or just another step back in recovery, but I am just not doing well. I do well for a couple weeks, and then I fall off the wagon. I had kept off the scale for awhile, and then I suspected I was losing again. I was restricting more and exercising more. Sure enough I was down a pound or two. I had those mixed feelings of knowing that this was bad, but wanting to celebrate the loss. I prayed yesterday for God to just take this ED from me and then last night I wanted to eat. I mean, I really wanted to. I did eat and then spent the evening adding up my damage for the day and plotting as to how to fix it. I exercised for 1 1/2 hours today and haven't eaten a thing. All this to try to balance out one meal from yeaterday. This is insanity and I know it. For some reason, I am so reluctant to give this ED up. I think I want it gone, but I must still be getting something out of it, or I would relinquish this control. Sigh.

Ilse

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2006
Thu, 04-19-2007 - 5:36pm

Hello Ilse! Welcome to the board!


Thank you for stepping out of lurkdom and being honest with where you are. The recovery process is never easy - there are good and bad

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2006
Thu, 04-19-2007 - 5:47pm

I'm doing ok. Things have been better but things can be worse. I'm not feeling so well

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2007
Fri, 04-20-2007 - 10:38am

I went on vacation and it was so challenging! We went out to eat every single day and I had no clue how many calories I was eating! It totally freaked me out! I didn't eat snacks so I don't know if I ate enough or to much but starting today I'm getting back on track. I hate that I can't enjoy something because I don't know what is in it.

~alex~

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
Fri, 04-20-2007 - 12:42pm

Hi Ilse, sorry to hear things are tough for you right now.

 

 

~Diana~