M.I.L dying

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2004
M.I.L dying
10
Fri, 07-07-2006 - 10:44pm
Hello. My husband's Mother was only diagnosed with cancer last month. His family was told today that she may only have days left. It is all so quick it doesn't feel real.
I'm trying my best to be supportive to my husband, listen to him when he needs to talk and just hold him when he can't. Unfortunately the family is becoming literally hostile to each other and that is of course making things all the more difficult. Only my husband and one sister have been always sensitive and careful of how they are around the others, Father and Mother included. I am staying out of 'their circle' out of respect. Tomorrow my husband and his Father are going to make the arrangements with the funeral director,,,my heart is breaking for them. I guess I don't really know how to explain so much in such a short space,,,but I truly fear what is going to happen because of the way some of his siblings are conducting themselves right now. Selfish motives are raising their ugly heads and some dreadful things have been said. I realize everyone deals with tragic situations differently but I thought and so wish they would pull together instead of fighting with each other. What does one say to their husband when he is trying so hard to be strong for his grief-stricken Father and dying Mother while having to deal with the way his siblings are being? I know there is no real answer to my question, except to just be there for him. I just wish I had the words to offer that would alleviate all of his sorrow. Thanks for letting me write here,,,just needed a place to put down some of my thoughts and frustrations. Prayers to all who want or need them,,,,Abby
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 4:24am

Hi Abby, nice to see you again, I'm glad you posted :)

Judy

cl-ivhjude

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2004
Sat, 07-15-2006 - 2:08pm
I just wanted to thank you Judy for your very thoughtful and kind response to my post. My M.I.L passed away in her sleep a couple of days ago. It is all very sad for the family and I can see there are many hurdles new and old for us all to climb over. Again I thank you very much for your consideration and time,,,,Blesses,,,,Abby
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Sun, 07-16-2006 - 3:21am

Abby I am so sorry for your loss.

Judy

cl-ivhjude

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2006
Mon, 07-24-2006 - 5:22pm

Abby,
My thoughts are with you and your family. I know this is a tough time and family does tend to get at each others throats. Last summer, my grandmother was murdered, and my mother and her sister were constantly into it with their brother. It's hard but in the end you are all there for each other.

Take care
Cheryl

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Mon, 07-24-2006 - 7:36pm
Cheryl, nice to see you, thanks for posting.

Judy

cl-ivhjude

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2006
Mon, 07-24-2006 - 8:02pm

Judy,
Yeah I was able to stay out of most of the arguments. Since, again, I live in CT and they all live in Louisiana. It's been one year and the trial hasn't started yet so my family is still a little on edge. With that and then mom having the cancer, it's a lot to digest.

Family sticks together, I know that sounds cliche'. But my family in Louisiana is there for each other no matter what.

Thanks again and take care Judy
Cheryl

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Wed, 07-26-2006 - 6:25pm
Cheryl, I am so glad your family is there for each other in spite of the stress.

Judy

cl-ivhjude

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 07-27-2006 - 12:42am

Hi Cheryl:


So sorry to hear about your grandmother.

Hope everyone has a great Summer!

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2005
Thu, 08-03-2006 - 12:29am
Oh, Abby, I am sooo sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. May God bless you and yours during this time of sorrow. We all have tissues for you and ears to vent when you need us.
{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}
Love,
Keleigh
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Fri, 08-04-2006 - 3:27pm
Keleigh, it's nice to see you, how are things going for you?

Judy


cl-ivhjude
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"With understanding, fear diminishes;
in the

Judy

cl-ivhjude