Hospice Care for Mom

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2004
Hospice Care for Mom
21
Wed, 07-26-2006 - 10:32pm

Hi. I called hopice this week and they came yesterday. Her Doctors never even mentioned Hospice to me, I called on my own.My Mom is getting so bad so quickly. I cant believe she was walking and driving and taking care of herself a month ago. Her Ca diagnosis was a month ago. I guess because the Breast CA went un-detected for so long,it had years to grow and spread.

She started having periods of confusion today which absolutely broke my heart. I have been taking care of her all by myself since she came home from the hospital weeks ago. She is unable to get out of bed. She told me today that she was not talking to me today because I did not talk to her yesterday. I wanted to cry. I was with her all day yesterday. My poor children are so upset that I do not have the time that I usually have for them. It is tough. They are still very young,9 and 5, to truly understand.

I know that my Mom did not mean what she said to me. It still made me feel bad. I want my Mom back. The way she was. And I know that will never happen. She still managed to make a joke today when she was having a good moment. She is also so depressed.

Thanks for listening. Please say a prayer for us all.

Elena

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 07-27-2006 - 12:33am

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Hi Elena


Oh you sound like such a wonderful daughter.

Hope everyone has a great Summer!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2004
Thu, 07-27-2006 - 10:13pm

My Mom is in a coma. She was talking with periods of confusion yesterday. She woke up at 5 am and called me. I sat in the chair in her room with her until 7 am.A few hours later I could not get her to respond to me. She is fighting like heck.

This is all so quick. Please pray for my family and her. I am trying to be strong but it is sooo hard.

Elena

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 07-28-2006 - 12:55am

(((((((Gentle Hugs Elena)))))))))))


I am so sorry about Mom.

Hope everyone has a great Summer!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Fri, 07-28-2006 - 1:34am

Elena the prayers have never stopped and will continue.

Judy

cl-ivhjude

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Fri, 07-28-2006 - 1:43am
Elena I am so sorry to hear your mom is in a coma, it sounds like the end is very near.

Judy

cl-ivhjude

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2004
Sat, 07-29-2006 - 4:31pm

My Mom passed away yesterday. She fought like crazy but unfortunately she could not win this day.

I am so sorry that I can't write more about what happened, but I can't stop crying. It has always been me and my Mom. I am trying to be strong for my children but it is soo hard. My 5 year old is taking it so hard. She kept going into my Mom's room while she was in a acoma and sitting down next to her and holding her hand. She just cries and cries that she wants her Nana, who is going to give her "nana hugs". My daughter went and put some of her stuffed animals and baby dolls on the bed with my Mom. I can barely cope but watching my daughter in so much pain is almost too much to bear.

I did have the Hospice social worker meet with both of my children. She talked with them and felt that they will be okay--acting appropriately etc.

My husband and I were with her when she passed.

I wanted to thank you all for your support. It has helped me more than words can say.....

Elena

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Sun, 07-30-2006 - 2:46pm

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(((((((((((((((((((((((((((Elena)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


I only wish I could be there in person


to give you these hugs.


I am so sorry for your loss Elena.


I knew by your posts the end was near dear but


I just couldn't say it in words.

Hope everyone has a great Summer!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Mon, 07-31-2006 - 5:28am

Elena please know we care about you and what has happened

Judy

cl-ivhjude

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2005
Wed, 08-02-2006 - 10:21pm
Oh, Darlin' I am sooo very sorry for your loss! Honey, please take advantage of Hospice! They offer bereavement council to families for up to 12 months. You all need this. I'm about to experience this first hand with BOTH my dad & mom. Remember we all love you. Please let us know how things are going. We are all in your pocket, if you ever need a hand to hold, we have Kleenex for your tears, and lots of love and hugs for you and your family. Take very good care of yourself. You need it.
Love, hugs, kleenex, and prayers,
Keleigh
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2004
Fri, 08-11-2006 - 12:34pm

Hi Everyone. I just wanted to say thank you again for all your support and "hugs".
Yes, Keileigh, I did as you said and I am taking advantage of what Hospice has to offer us. My son and daughter are with a Hospice counselor as we speak doing art therapy with them. I am so concerned about my 5 year old girl because she appears to be taking this the hardest-besides me. She just cried and cried. She tells me everyday that she misses her. We have all lived in the same house all of our lives so that makes it so much more difficult.
I know we all need time. I just hate feeling this void.And the anger I have that she went mis-diagnosed for so long is not helping. Doctor after Doctor, test after test. Now to open up the wound more, her Dr signed on the death certificate that she had Metastatic breast Cancer for 2 years......They only correctly diagnosed her a month before she passed. I know that I have to work through the anger to help myself heal. I will, I guess that takes time too. As all things do.:)

Thanks again for all you have done for me.......

Elena

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