Just found you, I need you

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2005
Just found you, I need you
4
Wed, 08-02-2006 - 11:12pm
Hi, I'm Keleigh, and I just stumbled and found you. Please kick back and read if only you have time. My mom was diagnosed with colon cancer 8 years ago. She did the surgery, did the chemo (which she has said she would NEVER do again), and was fine. Till a few years later. She had breast cancer. She did radiation that time and did very well. No surgery. Then, 1 year later, she got lung cancer. All these cancers came from her colon cancer. She is on a hormone therapy treatment (1 pill per day) for the lung cancer. It has not spread, it has not shrunk, that is fine. In May, her doctor found her cancer came back in her breast. She has 6 months (as of May, it is now August) to decide what to do.
Now here goes... On May 26, my dad had a TIA (mini-stroke), and was hospitalized for 3 days then sent home. Because of his TIA, mom never told him about her cancer returning. On June 16th, my dad had a 2nd TIA and was hospitalized again. He had a third one on June 27th. He remained in the hospital till July 6th. He was diagnosed with the early stage of Alzhiemer's disease. One hour before he was transfered to a rehabilitation center for ot/pt/speech therapy, we found out from the internal medicine doctor, that he has advanced cancer. It is in his bladder, adrenal glands, and lungs. He was given 6 months, if that to live. He is on Hospice now, but not at the hospice center. They are completely booked with a waiting list. I know, and accept what is going on with both my parents. But to lose both so close is going to be hard. I know my mom will not do anything about her cancer. All their affairs are in order and they both have living wills, so no life support what-so-ever. I spend at least 10-12 hours with my dad every day (I'm on summer break. I teach mild-moderate special needs kids at a elementary school). My mom has been soo sick, since dad's 2nd stroke with the vomiting and diarreha (sp). She can only come in the afternoons, when she can. My sister and her family live 60 miles away, and can only come 1 afternoon a week for 1-2 hours, and one day on weekends. I have pretty much been the expert on TIA's, Alzheimers, cancers, legal stuff, etc, you name it. I'm sooo tired of dealing with doctors, nurses, Hospice, therapists, lawyers, legal stuff, etc. But I'm the only one that does this. No one else will. Also, when we found out dad has only a matter of weeks to live, I have started having horrid nightmares. I hate the night. I do not want to sleep and I make myself stay awake for hours on end. Everything is falling apart around me that I can just barely deal with it all. Usually during the summer I find other work to help my husband pay the bills, but now I know why I never got a summer job. My job is my parents. I have no regrets on that, but now we are getting behind on our own bills. My stress level is so much! I keep thinking, I start back to work in 2 weeks. It will get better. But a small part of me says not just yet.
Sooo very sorry to be so windy! I just found you all, and any advice, hugs, prayers, anything to keep me somewhat sane, will help a lot.
Love to all on this board,
Keleigh
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2003
Fri, 08-04-2006 - 3:39pm

Keleigh, welcome to the board, I'm glad you found us.

Judy

cl-ivhjude

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-09-2003
Sun, 08-06-2006 - 3:11am

Was just passing by here tonight and saw your post.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Sun, 08-06-2006 - 5:39pm

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Keleigh


I am so glad you were able to find our board and reach out.

Hope everyone has a great Summer!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2005
Mon, 08-07-2006 - 11:45am
Thank you all for your kindness, caring, and support. Meeting today with the Hospice nurse about my dad this afternoon. Will let you all know how it goes. Thank you all soo much!
Keleigh
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