I am new and I am scared

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-2007
I am new and I am scared
12
Mon, 07-30-2007 - 11:00am

Hi everyone

I need an outlet for my anxiety over my daughter's brain cancer.
She has a glioma tumour with malignant cells.

We found out on Jan 30th 2004. (It was on my son's birthday.)

I went into a fugue-type state and have very little memory the first 2 weeks after we found out.
It took me 2 weeks to cry because I was not accepting the diagnosis.

I have since divorced (didn't want that either) and I have lost most of my/our friends in this mess.

I am 50 years old and most do not know how to handle me, what to say, so they stay away.
I stay away from them too. I feel more irritated after being with them.

I have had psychiatric help for all the grieving - loss of marriage, friendships, and terminal illness.

People tell me that I have to "start a new life".
This only makes me more anxious/sad/confused...)

I should say that my daughter is/seems healthy right now.
She has had surgery and chemo.

I would like to hear back from anyone who might care.

Sue

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2007
Wed, 08-08-2007 - 10:35pm

Philly,
Thank you for your reply. Some days are good and others not so good.

You are right, people have busy lives and I really understand this. Since I posted the last email (on one of my down times), I have called and made some plans with my friends. I don't talk about my sister with them, however it would be nice once in a while for them to ask. Some do.

Yes my sister would prefer me to be happy and carry on with my life in a normal way. She is so unselfish and told her family she worries about them. I will miss her so much. She is not only my sister..she is also my friend.

Thanks again,
Gayle

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-26-2008
Tue, 02-26-2008 - 12:47pm

Sue:


My name is Sandy.

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