Dad just given 3 months
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| Sat, 08-25-2007 - 9:49pm |
I just had a post on here that I found out they were ending treatment for my dad. Today my parents came to visit and told me that the doctors estimated him having about 3 months to live. Hospice is coming to the house on Monday to work on getting things set up. They can work with the Red Cross to try to get my brother home from Iraq. Hopefully it won't be hard, he's already been there for 13 months.
I don't think I'll ever forget the look in my dad's eyes when he told me he had three months. He eyes were so sad. I don't think I've ever seen my dad look like that. I hate it. I don't know if I'll ever be able to get that memory out of my head.
I am completely devastated right now. I've known for some time that my dad wouldn't always be around. I've known that he wouldn't be here to celebrate my 30th birthday, or see me get married, or have children. But I don't think I ever really "got" it. Now he might not be around for my 27th birthday.
And I feel like I just haven't done enough for my dad. Like for him to be proud of. I guess I just want my dad to leave here knowing that I'll be ok. You know? It's stupid, but, before the cancer, my dad had his own landscaping business. And when they came over today, my lawn wasn't mowed or anything like that. Now I know it's probably the last time he'll be there. And I just felt like I wish it was better and all perfect looking so that he would be proud. It sounds stupid, but it makes sense in my head.
Oh, I don't know what to do. I can't get through this. I can't do this. Please send me all your thoughts and prayers. I'm going to need them.

Oh I am so sorry you received this news about Dad.
(((((Sweetie)))))
It is ok sweetheart. My dad was given 6 months and he stayed with us for 9 months. My dad passed away on July 28, 2007. Get involved with Hospice, even if by phone. They are wonderful. My dad was with Hospice and I can honestly say I don't know how I would of done it without them. Whatever time your precious dad has left be it 3, 6 or 9 months, spend as much time with him and your mom as you can.
Don't worry about your dad being proud. I will guarantee you he is as is your mom. You sound like such a wonderful caring daughter, why wouldn't they be proud. Remember too sweetheart this terrifying news is very new and your feelings are very raw. What your feeling is normal. You are ok just remember to take care of yourself and remind your sweet mom to do the same that is so very important. If you are in the process of planning your wedding, keep your mom and your dad involved, it will mean the world to him.
I know you hurt because I did, but then I had to focus on his care and his needs. Thats where Hospice is God sent. They will help with anything and everything. If he needs equipment they will get it for him. If you just need to talk they will listen.
Please let us know how you and your family is doing. I am sure your brother will be able to come home and that will be great for all of you.
Take care sweetheart
Love ya
Gail
xoxoxoxoxo