dads depressed

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2007
dads depressed
1
Sun, 09-09-2007 - 7:12pm
weve been thru it all with my dad. hes has surgery, chemo, etc. they finally told him thurs that theres nothing else to do. its a matter of time. they wouldnt say when, could be tomorrow or 6 months but its inevitable. the lung cancer is continueing to spread & out of control. ive been battling w/ him for 4 years over depression anyway. he lives w/ my grandmother. shes told me he has given up & she wants me to do something. since i left him thur, i guess he hasnt turnd on the tv, left his bed or eaten. he wont come to live w/ me, my grandma doesnt want that anyway. she wants to be w/ him. should i try harder to help his mood, do i sound uncompassionate? in a way im tired cuz of his depression, ive saved him from 4 suicide attempts. this is almost a slap in the face. he wont say it but its like "you shouldve let me be so i wouldnt have suffered now". i know he loves me & wouldnt say that but i know its there in his thoughts. i feel that if death is inevitable & if he's chosen to not fight it anymore then why struggle so hard to lenghthen his life when all that really means is that he could suffer for 6 months before he takes his last breath. its not been easy to accept & wont when it finally happens but im not looking forward to seeing his suffer for the next few months either. so the ? is if hes choosing to give up is it ok to accept that or should i be trying harder to lift his moods. if he was well enough to do things, id be there in a heartbeat. he went to our lake house w/ us last weekend & enjoyed that but already in 6 additional days he cant catch his breath walking to the bathroom & back. thanks for any comments
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: c_suzanne
Sun, 09-09-2007 - 11:40pm

Hello Suzanne


I am truly sorry your Dad is so very ill.

Hope everyone has a great Summer!

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