Dad Very Irriatable - HELP!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Dad Very Irriatable - HELP!
1
Mon, 04-21-2008 - 1:17pm

Hi Everyone!!


My Dad has had two major surgeries, lost ALOT of weight, is very weak, and chemo treatments for over 1 month. He is extremely angry, irritable, and his sense of humor and laughter has disappeared. I'm a nurturer at heart, and I ask everyday how he's feeling, what he had for breakfast/lunch/dinner, if he needs anything, etc. When I ask him these questions, his anger is overwhelming. It's very tough for me to cope with a father that is so angry about everything I do or don't do. It's upsetting to hear and see his anger when I'm just trying to help him.  It sounds selfish, but it makes me angry sometimes because he doesn't seem to appreciate anything. Plus, everyday he makes comments about how helpless, dependent, weak, bored, and "why me". Which basically shows he's depressed as well. He's going through such a tough time right now, and I realize his anger, irritability, depression is normal, but I'm lost how to cope. I try everyday to be cheerful, laugh, smile, be positive....and everyday he responds with angry, rude remarks.


At first I went to his house everyday to do housework, cooking, and just spend time with him. I've cut back to visiting 3-4 days a week (I call once everyday), so he has time alone. Does anyone have experience with this??? How do I handle my father?? I'm completely lost at how to handle this?? I would love to hear from anyone who has had similar experiences.  My Dad still has along road ahead, so any advice would be much appreciated. Thanks for your support!!!!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2007
Tue, 04-22-2008 - 1:14am

thh8.jpg image by maggie3333


It's hard to care for someone when it feels as if they don't care if you are there or not.

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