Need some advice
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| Wed, 05-14-2008 - 11:29am |
This is a long story but any advice anybody can provide would be awesome. :)
When I was 15, my grandma (who lived in the MIL house and who, with my parents, raised me) was diagnosed with brain cancer. She had bad emphyzema and the tumor was in the lower back right of her brain, impacting speech/memory/motor skills. Because of the breathing issues, she couldn't have any operation - otherwise she'd have to stay on a respirator forever. They did chemo but it did nothing, and I took care of her for 8 agonizing, awful months while she slowly slipped away. That destroyed me.
Now, the reason I'm posting here. My dad, who will be 60 in a few days, has advanced Crohn's disease and a plethora of other health issues - osteoporosis from decades of prednisone, horrible nutritional absorption, kidney stones, massive weight loss (he's 6' and weighs about 120 lbs right now), etc. Over the past few months his fatigue has gotten a lot worse, and he's been getting blood transfusions. They thought it was just from poor absorption of nutrients in his intestines at first, but the transfusions are more often and more units.
Right now he's getting 3 units of blood every 2 weeks. He's exhausted, he's bruised all over (part prednisone caused), and he's terrified. They did all the tests known to man, found nothing, and then they did a bone marrow aspiration a few weeks ago. We get results tonight.
The general consensus in the family is that he's got leukemia or lymphoma. He's so afraid that they'll tell him he's dying or has no hope. The doctors told him (at age 25) he'd never live to see 60, and he'll be doing just that in 2 weeks or so.
What if he DOES have a blood cancer? Is there anything they can even do for someone in such horrible health? Can they give him chemo or radiation therapy? WOn't that just make him lose more weight? He already weighs nothing and his muscles are just gone.
It absolutely breaks my heart to see my mom watch her best friend and the man she's in love with fade away like this. It breaks my heart to watch my father, the strongest and smartest person I've ever met, sit with tears in his eyes from fear and anger and frustration because he feels awful and nothing helps and he can't figure out what to do.
How do I help myself and my family deal with this? How do we get through this?
Any advice anybody can provide would be greatly appreciated.

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