Registry blues

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2008
Registry blues
18
Fri, 05-16-2008 - 10:17pm

Hey, I'm really frustrated and just wanted a place where I could vent a little bit. I'm 37 (and a half) weeks pregnant with my first baby. I've been lucky enough to have people at several different places who threw me baby showers (a total of four which is amazing to know that there are so many people who care about me). I'm just a little bit irritated because almost nobody has gotten anything off my registry. I don't say anything to the people because I don't want them to think that I'm not grateful for what they've done or gotten me because I really am, but part of me feels kind of offended that no one has even taken the time to look at it. I wouldn't be so upset but I spent every day off from work I had for a MONTH!!! between 8 and 12 hours a day at different stores choosing EXACTLY what I feel that I needed to make the nursery look absolutely perfect for when we bring him home. When it wasn't my day off I spent hours of my time online comparing my registry from different places deleting off duplicate items so that I wasn't registered for the same thing at two different places. I then looked online to see of the three places I was registered at, which had the best deal on what I had chosen so that I knew that my guest would get the very best deal I could find for them. I didn't really even register for outrageously priced items, most were between 1 and 40 dollars (40 being on the higher side). I couldn't possibly afford to go and buy everything that I needed for the baby which is why I had some small things that, if everyone could get me like one small item off my registry would add up to almost everything that I needed. This has been eating me up for week now. I really do appreciate what my friends and family have gotten me but I ended up getting more clothes of all the same size than he could possibly EVER wear before he grows out of all of them I have well over 2,500 diapers OF ALL THE SAME SIZE (and what nobody even at is that we've been looking at cloth because it's more cost efficient and environmentally friendly), that's mostly what we got were clothes and more diapers. No one got any bottles or anything and now my nursery it pretty mismatched and the bedding that we did get is all mismatched, and I wanted it to look absolutely beautiful when we brought him home. I'm mainly frustrated because I feel that I've wasted my time and nobody really cared enough to look at things that I had spent so much time on. Then today I was talking to a close friend about this and another person overheard who was at one of the showers and didn't' get something off my registry, and pretty much completely chewed me out. She was saying that not everyone could afford things on it but I explained it was all smaller stuff and that if people had just each gotten one small inexpensive thing on there it would have added up to a lot. I mean for Christ's sake... I ended up with 4 count em' FOUR diaper bags for people and I never even registered for one because I had one that I had already picked out and bought for my self that I would mind carrying around. Now I have four diaper bags that I would never use (much too juvenile), and have no way to return because people took the tags off of them. I probably sound like a spoiled little brat and I don't mean to come across that way I'm just so frustrated because I wasted my time and energy on something that proved to be pointless. And I was trying to make sure that things were organized for people and they knew what I needed and had already gotten and nothing went as planned or as smoothly as I was trying to make it for people. Now I'm 2 and a half weeks away from my due date and have more returns to do that I could possibly get done, am going to be out a lot of money that I don't even have on making up the difference on things I can't return,

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 6:59pm

I do hope the venting helped you to feel better! I have a feeling i'll be experiencing just what you described, and the group not even bothering to look at the registry will include my MIL, I just can't wait! LOL For our wedding 3 years ago, she first wanted to get us a HUGE stand mixer (read: has to sit out in the counter) in a color we hadn't chosen, then she ended up getting us a vacuum that wasn't the one we registered for. We liked it ok, altho now it's not working! UGH!


But I can JUST imagine what she'll be getting us. We'll just REALLy have to reinforce that we have NO EXTRA SPACE for toys for when the baby is 2 or 3, clothes in size 4T etc etc. And I'm picky picky about things, but at the same time, I may just not even bother to register at ALL! Between Target always changing stock and making things on every registry I've ever tried to buy from on clearance and thusly not available to your plight of people buying you things that weren't ANYWHERE on your registry and I cannot imagine taking tags off. I mean, I'll give the actual receipt if I forget to get a gift receipt....oh and I recently heard that I think it's Target, if someone buys something off thhe registry, it takes up to 72 hours for it to come off the registry, so can you IMAGINE the week before the shower, people are buying things they THINK are still needed but in fact, 10 other people are buying or have already bought. Kind of a bad system if you ask me! Registries can be great, but some of the systems just suck!


But it's just sounding like people who were at your showers really weren't thinking of what you might actually NEED. We just had a shower for a coworker who's baby is almost 2 months old now. she had registered at a few places but had already had a few other showers. A bunch of us chipped in cash and then got her a target gift card. That way, when she needs the next size of diapers or some more onsies, she can go get them THEN instead of having to root thru a box of things to find them.


It's really a tough one tho. we had such good luck with people buying off our registry for the wedding, but who knows about the baby! I've got my fingers crossed, but you just never know!!!

Coli

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-01-2004
Sun, 05-18-2008 - 9:54am

Even without the tags, I would try to return everything you don't need.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2008
Tue, 05-27-2008 - 12:34pm
Try selling the extra items on ebay, if the stores won't take them back. I would make my husband or some friends help me return stuff. You should be relaxing. So take a breath don't freak out it will get done eventually.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2008
Sun, 06-22-2008 - 9:19pm

It's kind of weird, I found with both my wedding and my sister's that people always buy off the registry, but with baby showers, not so much. I too find it really annoying -- even though of course I am grateful that they bought me a gift -- because a lot of times they buy you something you need (like a bouncer) but not the one you want. This happened to me, and yeah, it still bounces, but I liked the one I picked out! It's not as if mine was more expensive. Plus no one ever includes gift receipts, which is totally annoying.


I am anticipating getting

Maria

Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2008
Tue, 06-24-2008 - 12:21pm

Everyone bought me clothes- I am not complaining because I needed them- btu there was a bunch of other stuff I needed as well that I did not get :(.


I understand the fustration at lack of gift reciepts.

  &nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2007
Thu, 06-26-2008 - 2:41pm

Hi Amber!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2008
Tue, 07-01-2008 - 7:11pm

Are baby registries common in your area? I'd never heard of them until a friend of mine got pregnant and it was on her invitation. They're just not common where I'm from (or at least among my circle of family and friends)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2008
Sun, 07-06-2008 - 5:09pm

I too don't understand why people don't use the registry!

                      

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
Sun, 07-06-2008 - 5:29pm
I went through the same thing. I think people don't like to use the registry because they are lazy and shopping for some is so last minute. I think in some stores you can take the item in without a receipt and get something else you might like and pay the difference if it's more. I have a friend who got a lot of stuff she didn't need and put it on craigslist and ebay. I know its frustrating to not get what you want. I filled out a registry with BRU and no one used it. What I got that I didn't want I regifted and gave it to a friend at her shower. She was very grateful. I know its sounds ungrateful but what I want I should get, after all this is my first pregnancy and I want what


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2008
Mon, 07-07-2008 - 7:56am

From my experience,

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