A few ??'s about Wills*M*

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2002
A few ??'s about Wills*M*
Mon, 03-31-2003 - 9:00pm
Anyone know an estimate of how much it costs to get a will done by an attorney? I need an attorney to do it because theres one important thing that cant have a loophole in it.

Theres been some drama going on with my parents and sisters to read all about it go here


it's long anyway and I need to have a will drawn up saying my MIL get custody of the baby incase somethings happens to both Dh and I. I also need it to say FLAT OUT my parents CAN NOT see my child. is that possible?

We are thinkinga bout putting a list of people in order to get custody of the baby in case the first.and so on person isn't alive at that point if it comes to that.is that possible?

basically I just need to make sure my parents wont be able to touch my child, MY child WILL NOT grow up like i did. I swear i'm going straight from the hospital to the lawyer.

chelle 22 dh larry 26 and alex or alexa due sept 22nd

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 6:19am
Since one of your sisters is a minor

you can call child protective services tell them ONLY the facts about your parents you can call without them knowing it was you

just tell the authorities about the drug use and there being a minor in the house and they will investigate it

As for your older sister there is nothing you can do for her the only way to help her know is FOR HER to decide to go to a specialist to get help OR for her to commit a crime bad enough for the state to help her you can maybe persuade her when she is more lucid but you have to be careful with Bi polar (my sister and mother both bipolar) they can blow things WAY out of proportion really fast (as you already know)

Take care


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Tue, 04-01-2003 - 6:31am
First, you can do the will before the baby is born, just specify custody of any children (current or future). the attorney will help you do this...

You can have a primary person and a back up. Be sure and check with both these people before writing your will, that they are willing to do this.

About visitation, I think that you can put whatever you want in the will but it doesn't mean that some judge won't overthrow it. Do your in laws have adequate financial resources to hire an attorney in case your family initiates a custody battle? If not, then you will need additional life insurance to cover this.

Express your concerns to the attorney and let him/her help you get everything in order.

Also, remember that as time passes, it may be necessary to update your will, so don't forget about it (ie one of your choices for guardian dies or otherwise becomes unavailable)

good luck--aren't families grand?

Avatar for 2pumpkinpies
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 04-02-2003 - 8:52pm
So sorry to hear about your family situation but it sounds like you are handling it well.

We drew up wills after our first child was born. The way they are worded covers any children born into our marriage even if they are not named in the will, although the lawyer said it would be a good idea to have them updated. We named two different families as guardians (1st and 2nd choices) just in case and two different people as trustees, also 1st and 2nd choices. In our family, the people who are good money managers aren't necessarily interested in raising children and vice versa. We talked to everyone involved and got their buy-in. We also had written into our wills how we would like our children raised, what the money could be used for and when the children could gain control themselves and under what circumstances they couldn't (mental illness, drug or alcohol abuse, etc.). We paid $750 for the wills and some other financial planning at the same time at a law firm that specialized in estate planning. It would've been a lot less w/o the financial planning.

Good luck - it was tough for us and we like our families!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 04-03-2003 - 9:50pm
We are in the middle of getting a will done (the lawyer is working on it as we speak). We designated our 1st & 2nd choice of where our kids will go (We had to choose a 2nd choice in case the 1st choice wasn't capable or was deceased). We also chose someone to be power of attorney, how any money/assets would be divided among kids, etc. We haven't gotten a final bill yet, but it is to cost between $160-180. I don't think this is too much money, considering it gives peace of mind knowing where your kids will go and that they are well taken care of!!

Good luck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 04-04-2003 - 6:06am
My co-worker got one done this week and it is costing $350.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 04-04-2003 - 1:15pm
It may depend on where you live, but we paid $150 for ours about 2 years ago, after my ds was born. Didn't read about your family situation, but sounds similar to mine, wouldn't let my parents have my kids ever, so we had the will done. Really needed it done anyway, but that was motivation.