Keeping leaders / parents happy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Keeping leaders / parents happy
Mon, 07-06-2009 - 10:45am

I'm unhappy today.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2004
Mon, 07-06-2009 - 3:52pm


Mass emails like that would have me fit to be tied.


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Tue, 07-07-2009 - 6:37am

Don't even get me started on his kid, (who isn't a problem child, but brings problems with him KWIM?)

They don't drive, so he won't go elsewhere.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2002
Tue, 07-07-2009 - 10:47am

"Which brings me to my question?

Who keeps you happy? If watching the kids grow isn't doing it for you, should someone step in? Who? A peer? Someone 'over' you?

Does your district, neighborhood, council do anything to thank you or build you up?


hmmm...who keeps me happy. I have only been a leader for three years and for me it is still about the girls. My oDD is very excited for scout activities which charges up the younger ones in my house. My oDS will be a cub scout next year and there are two more to follow.

That being said, I do get tired by the end of the year. My area is pretty good at boosting leaders at the leader meetings. Mainly just give and take conversations.

At the end of the year they work in all the thanks pins, appreciation pins and other council recognitions with the bridging. Last year we had pizza at the last leader meeting of the year too.

I do think that if I were having a problem with a parent that someone from the organization should step in. Last year a parent from another troop had issue with their leader. They came to me because I am the school organizer. I talked with the leader and it was just a miscommunication and resolved quickly. Maybe even asking another leader to step in and explain how something is done might help??? If he is sending his emails to so many people I don't understand why the district won't step in. Clearly he is unhappy. Sending it to the scouts when these are adult issues is totally unacceptable. Sending it to the other parents is annoying to the other parents I am sure.

Sorry I am not much help. I hope things get back to normal for you.
Liza in WI

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2004
Tue, 07-07-2009 - 12:04pm

I guess the only thing I can say is that open communication is the only way to really keep people somewhat happy and the other thing is a cliche but true- no matter what you do, you will not be able to make all the people happy all the time.

What I do is at the very beginning of the year, I have a parents meeting (to which some parents don't come and then it's on them if they have a problem, IMO) and I tell them what we will be doing and what we will need help with and what my expectations are for the girls, ie, they will wear their uniform, they will treat each other well, they do their share, etc. For the parents- providing transportation is part of the deal. I give each parent a troop roster and let them know that if they are having transpo issues, they should call another parent and try to carpool. My parents have been GREAT about this. I mean, really great. My family moved to the other side of town and we are now a 30-40 minute drive from our meeting place and they know that I am not going to be picking kids up for activities and they always do a great job of arranging who is driving, etc. Also, I always ask for help. I didn't use to, but now I do and it just works better. Especially face to face. It's harder to say no when you ask face to face. Having help keeps me happier.

The reason I do GS is for my DD but also over the last five years, watching the girls grow has become one of my reasons that I do this. I think that if Hannah quit, I'd probably stay with the troop, at least for awhile.

As far as DS, well I guess I am turning into THAT parent. His den leader drives me nuts! I have tried to butt out, but I am getting to the point of wanting to switch dens. If D didn't love his buddies in his den, I'd do it in a heartbeat (and still might). At the end of the school year, his DL told us that they were going to go on their last go-see-it and they would receive all the belt loops they earned but he asked us to email them to him again (for the 3rd time). That was in early May. Have never heard another word about the go-see-it or the belt loops despite me emailing him 3 more times asking about it -yet he got the evite I sent to his son inviting him to D's b-day party. He is on his blackberry 24/7 so I know he got all my emails and is just ignoring me. Yes, I am PO'd. So then D earned a ton of belt loops and stuff at daycamp and I emailed him about that- still no answer. So I complained to the CM at our Fishing Derby. He emailed me and said he will personally get the belt loops that D earned because obviously that is the only way he is going to get them. Oh- another little complaint- his wife told me that all the boys in D's den were going to Day Camp. But when we got there, of course my DS was the only one from his den signed up. I'm sure it would have been a lot more fun for him if his friends had actually been there. But DL never handed out any info at all about day camp. It was left up to us to go sign up on the website if we wanted to do it. It was never even brought up at Den meetings and parents wouldn't have known about it if it wasn't mentioned at the Pack meeting. OK, sorry, ranting.

So I guess I am on both sides of this issue. I think some communication between DS's DL and I would go a long way to resolve these kinds of issues but he is just avoiding contact, so whatever. I'll just have to go around him, I guess.