Has Insulin Use Affected yours or DH job
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| Mon, 07-14-2008 - 4:01am |
Hi.
Times are confusing right now. My fiance, who is 46, spent 16 years driving a truck for a company which was originally owned by his family, then since bought out. He has had Type II for about 5 years now, but over time, it became harder and harder to control it with just pills, so in February, his doc put him on insulin shots.
As soon as his boss found out he had to take insulin, he was fired, because a truck driver is not allowed to drive a vehicle over 10,000 pounds and take insulin, which were both the cases for him.
He was devestated, and has since applied for disability (which he was denied, but just appealed - it took months, though - crazy), and he's applied for unemployment too. The whole thing has depressed him. I am out of work too for another reason.
I have asked other people their opinion on my situation - he is depressed too, and he can't really do too much at the moment, because a couple months back, they repossesed his truck because he could not make the payments. He's also run out of insulin, so tomorrow, I have to drive him down to Baltimore, to the hospital where he goes to the doctor, so he can get more for free.
I was just wondering if any of you have had this happen in a similar way. I worry about stuff like he's just using me and my mom (who also lives with us), because he brings home money, but I know that driving that truck was a big deal in his life and to lose his job like that must have really sucked.
I am trying to support him, in more ways than one, but sometimes find it hard - his numbers are also not great in the 400's a lot of the time.
Guess I just want your 2 cents - am I a sucker for letting him live in my house until he either gets a job, unemployment money, or disability money, or should I support him and be more understanding?
I mean we are engaged, but he's got to want to help himself, too. All of this has been a big blow to him, and it's tough for him to get going again, plus I'm going through bankruptcy - my mom's pension and social security each month is paying for everything in this house, but luckily, my unemployment was just approved, so things will get a lot better that way.
I just wanted the opinions of other diabetics here - a person has got to want to help themselves, but perhaps my mom and I are being a bit impatient until we find out about his unemployment and disability - we just need him to help, if he's going to live here and get everything free - he's got not money, and he hasn't paid for barely anything in months.
What do you think?
Thank you for your advice.
Julie

Hi Julie and welcome to the board.
Actually as I understand it, there are some pretty strict DOT regs that restrict over the road truckers.
Julie,
There is a lot going on here. On top of losing his job, his diabetes isn't under control. That alone can make him feel awful. Add that to the stress that you feel for losing your own job and your household must be like a powder keg, ready to explode.
Frankly, I think you need to tackle one thing at a time. Probably both of you could use a third party to talk to about this. It takes about 2 years to be declared disabled for social security and usually three denials. In my county we have SSI advocates and there may be such a person in your county. If that is the case then they
Hi Coldfingers,
I am sorry that I have not had an opportunity to respond to your help until now. However, I just wanted to thank you for your information.
No, he is not bringing home money right now; however, since I wrote the original post, he has been approved for unemployment (although his former boss is being a PITA about it!), and he has appealed his disability. I also was approved for disability, so things *hopefully* will be looking up, soon.
In my heart, I sort of know that he would not 'use' me or my mom intentionally - it must be tough to have diabetes that is not under control, but he is getting free insulin from his doctor in Baltimore - they are experimenting with different types of insulin to try and lower his blood sugar - I hope something helps!
Again, thank you for your help. I am glad I found your board!
Julie
xx
Thank you, Auntydoxzz, for your perspective on this. I replied to Coldfingers the CL on this board just a second ago and let everyone know the update with this.
He is exploring other career options. He would really like to go into radiology and hopes to first become an x-ray tech soon - that would be a good move, then he wouldn't have to worry about driving a truck.
Thanks again for your help!
Julie
xx
Mary Frances - I really, really appreciate all your knowledge and advice for who to contact for where to get help on this! I copied and sent your reply to my boyfriend, who also says thank you.
It's crazy how long it takes to get disability (if at all) for diabetes, especially if your job was eliminated because you had to go on insulin.
I am going to check some of the sources you posted - that is a goldmine of information, especially for people like we are that are kinda in shock over the whole thing and need all the help we can get (in more ways than one! LOL)
Thank you again - this was invaluable advice.
Julie
xx
Be sure if his employer appeals his getting unemployment that he does make himself available for a hearing if there is one.