Everyone's pregnant but me!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2008
Everyone's pregnant but me!
32
Mon, 01-21-2008 - 8:22pm

Hi, This is my first time posting to a board of any kind.  I just need a place to vent and hear from people in similar situations!


I'm 33 and have been happily married for 6 years.  We've been ttc for over 3 years now without success.  We're seeing a specialist (post-coital test tomorrow, fun fun!) and so far they can find nothing wrong.  My husband's count was a little low but he's made some changes and it's fine now.  I've been taking femara to ensure I'm producing a mature, healthy egg. 


The hardest part of this (and I'm sure many of you will agree) is what this does to us emotionally.  And now it seems like everyone is pregnant but me!  I know, I know...of course it seems that way when you're ttc but seriously, 5 of my friends are pregnant right now and 2 of them just had babies.  Most of these women are in my girls' night out group and I just hate going now.  I don't talk to any of them (except my sis) about what is going on...dh and I have agreed to keep it between us.  I went to girls night out last week and cried all the way home and woke up the next morning crying.  I am happy for all these women, of course!  But this last one to announce is three years younger than me and hasn't even been married a year!  My best friend from college always said she didn't want kids, decided in August she did, and was pregnant in two months!  It just seems so completely unfair...I've had a girl's name picked out since junior high.  I guess I'm just at the point that I either really want to get pregnant or be told we can't have kids so we can deal with it and look at other options. 


How do you get to the point of not being jealous and being able to socialize?  I'm the only married woman in our group who does not have children or isn't pregnant.  I'd love any advice any of you can give.  I shamefully admit that at times I feel jealous and I hate feeling that way.  Thanks for listening...

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2006
Mon, 01-21-2008 - 8:45pm

((((ncaunt))))


Welcome to the board.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2008
Mon, 01-21-2008 - 10:58pm

Ncaunt,


I completely understand how you feel!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2008
Tue, 01-22-2008 - 10:59am

Thank you so much, Stilltryin! That makes me feel much better. I think sometimes feeling guilty about being jealous is worth than the jealousy itself! I'd love to know the name of the book you mentioned. I wasn't sure if I was doing the right thing by avoiding baby showers, pg people, etc. but most times I just can't handle it. I have only told a couple of people that we are ttc so most of these women don't even know. Although sometimes do you feel like you're walking around with a sign on your head that says "I CAN'T GET PREGNANT!!"? lol I regret ever telling anyone at all! I wonder what most people do about telling/not telling friends, etc. I hate you'll have to be near your coworker and hear about it all the time!

I think the post-coital is standard for my RE (who I really like). I just started with him back in the spring but I feel like we're getting really good treatment. I think they're just wanting to make sure dh's sperm are surviving in there. If they're not, I think semination is the next step. We tried a couple of those with our last doc who was just a regular OB/GYN and did't have us do ov testing, BBT or anything. We realized quickly he was a waste of time. I was really surprised about this doctor putting me on femara which is chemotherapy! I did read somewhere that post-coitals are no longer standard but I don't see how it could hurt.

BTW I'm a furmommie too! I'd never heard that phrase before :-)
ncaunt

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-22-2008
Tue, 01-22-2008 - 12:27pm

Hello Ladies...I can't begin to tell you how NORMAL you make me all feel.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Tue, 01-22-2008 - 4:29pm

It does not bother me to be around pregnant women or see pregnant women, but when they talk about their pregnancy nonstop, that bugs me.


There is a woman in my office, very big and pregnant,

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2007
Tue, 01-22-2008 - 5:07pm

I love coming to these boards because I don't feel alone.

 


Me--age 35
      Off BCPs since 3/07
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2008
Tue, 01-22-2008 - 5:32pm

abcs24,


It is good not to feel alone and I agree that it is especially hard to hear pg women complain!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2007
Tue, 01-22-2008 - 8:32pm

hi girls- I just sit here and read your messages and say that is so me! I jump around to different boards but when i saw this topic i had to jump in.

   

                              

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2008
Tue, 01-22-2008 - 9:32pm

Hi teachy, I am so sorry about your mc.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2008
Tue, 01-22-2008 - 10:55pm

Hi, Ncaunt!

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