baby showers

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
baby showers
6
Thu, 03-06-2008 - 10:43pm

I hate them.  At least at the moment.  I am going to one next weekend - the first since we lost Elena.  And for a friend that got married 8 1/2 years after I did.  It's not fair - when will it be my turn?  Although I TRY to be happy for her, I am feeling bitter and jealous right now. 


Just venting.


Anyone else hate baby showers?


 

Sara, mom of 1 year old twin boys
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2006
Thu, 03-06-2008 - 10:54pm

(((Sara)))


Ooh, count me in!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2008
Thu, 03-06-2008 - 11:21pm

OMG!!!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
Fri, 03-07-2008 - 1:14am

OMG, I can't even go. I mean, I work with infants and toddlers for a living, but I can't handle a freakin' SHOWER!! My hat is off to you if you are able to go through with it. I usually thank the person for the invitation, find a viable excuse, and then mail a cute outfit.

The bottom line is, if you aren't able to do it, or just feel uncomfortable, never feel like you have to go. I always figure it's best if I stay away because my energy is probably not the positive happy-happy joy-joy that new babies and mommies need. None of my friends have been offended, and frankly if they were I think they might not be the best of friends.

You're not alone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-19-2004
Fri, 03-07-2008 - 4:29pm
I'm way way way past the point where I would even consider attending a baby shower no matter who it is. My SIL is pg, and if I'm not by that time I won't be attending, or buying a gift. DH can handle that. Heck, I won't even go to any event she is at, it would be too upsetting to even see her. Infertility is hard enough. Don't be a martyr to what you feel like you "should" do.
-Jenna, 39, DH 36 TTC our first since September '06 with MFI. 3 failed natural IUI's, I failed IUI with injectibles, 1 failed IVF, 1 FET ending in early m/c. Taking BCP's in preparation for IVF #2 now.

TTCYFC100
TTCYFC tag
- Jenna
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Fri, 03-07-2008 - 5:19pm

I have noticed that a lot of women hate them, because women feel obligated to attend them. There is a lot of pressure on women to go to baby showers and buy gifts for a woman they barely know. I am 7 weeks

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Fri, 03-07-2008 - 6:04pm

Thanks for you replies ladies. Helps me feel not so alone. While I say I hate showers, I still want to go to be there for my friend, whom I have been close to for years. Even though it will be hard. I just wanted a safe place to complain about my mixed feelings, so thanks for understanding. And I do say no to them if I really need to. There was one this past summer I did not go to b/c I knew I couldn't handle it at that point in time.

Ncaunt, how fun to hear you are a MSW as well! I have my LCSW too!

Tessmckenzie, if I was going to a baby shower for someone who had struggled through infertility, I think I would have a totally different attitude. You so deserve a happy baby shower and to glory in your baby bliss! I think this one is just hard for me b/c I have been trying to have kids for years longer than she... and she got pg at the drop of a hat.

Sara, mom of 1 year old twin boys