I just feel so bad

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2008
I just feel so bad
10
Wed, 08-27-2008 - 10:10am

I'm so sorry ladies, I am having just a downer of a week. I just can't seem to get out of this slum I'm having. Seriously, I find myself zoning out sometimes searching for reasons to be happy about something. Searching for a reason, not to cry. I'm sure it has something to do with it being the cycle after my HSG and my hopes were way way up about a BFP b/c of so many say about being VERY vertile after an HSG, but I only got the usual BFN. And I've had a tough cycle with my crazy RE, my insensitive father, and being outed by my step-mom. Let's just say, thank the Lord that August of 2008 is over and is never coming back!


Anywho, most of what makes this board work for me, is I love reading all your posts and giving my support to all of you. This helps me feel better about my IF issues and I feel like I'm connected to all of you through this tough experience. I understand how important it is that we all have each other, and I'm not participating outwardly, and for that I truly apologize. Please know, that I do read your posts and in my heart I'm keeping you and praying for you, though I may not say anything.

wedding2-1.jpg picture by Sbaltozer


 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2008
Wed, 08-27-2008 - 12:39pm

Roman,


Did AF come?

  

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2008
Wed, 08-27-2008 - 1:28pm
AF should be coming tomorrow. Believe me I was tempted to POAS just 10 minutes ago, but I looked in the mirror and said, "no, I'm not going to do that to you. Don't worry Roman, I'm not going to put you through that." Believe it or not, it really helped. Looking at myself in the mirror as if I was another person talking to me. I think it's the first time I truly realized that I have to treat MYSELF with some empathy. That I have to care for ROMAN as much as I care for my body. I think I may be realizing that the better I treat myself, emotionally, the less I will find offense when others are being insensitive. I think this may be an important lesson I take out of this horrible month.

wedding2-1.jpg picture by Sbaltozer


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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2008
Wed, 08-27-2008 - 4:25pm

Hi Roman!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2008
Wed, 08-27-2008 - 8:02pm

Hi Roman,


I can certainly relate to you and have been absent from the boards as well.

Christine

TTC since 2004 Me (33) DH (39)   MFI DX April 2008 

IVF-icsi #1 May 2008-July2008 - BFN!&nbs

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2008
Wed, 08-27-2008 - 8:34pm

Christine!
HOLY CATS!!! did you ever hit the nail on the head!!! I totally feel burnt out! But frankly, I'm too scared to take a break. Have a FAST 2ww. and here's to a better septmeber than august. Sending tons of baby dust!

Thanks!

wedding2-1.jpg picture by Sbaltozer


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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2008
Wed, 08-27-2008 - 10:13pm

Christine,


I know sometimes it might feel like you have to be positive and happy her all the time but if you need to vent or share frustration please do.

  

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2008
Thu, 08-28-2008 - 12:02am

Roman,


You know that I relate since two weeks ago I wrote a desperate post about "having a bit of a breakdown." It happens to all of us. The good news is that it passes, it really really does. I thought I would never feel better but lo and behold I do. And Susan had a crappy week last week as she told you and this week is better for her too. You never know what is around the corner - tomorrow is not written. Stay strong - thinking of you and sending you prayers.


TTC a little over a year; Dx: Suspected hormonal imbalance, short luteal phase. But mostly unexplained. DH is normal. IUI #1 with 100mg Clomid, progesterone suppositories
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2008
Thu, 08-28-2008 - 12:06am

It must be in the air, I relate to all of you!

- Misty, 34 DH 33  TTC since April 2006 with PCOS.  6 failed Clomid/IUI cycles in 2008. Six month break, six months of&n
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2008
Thu, 08-28-2008 - 5:49pm

Oh, Roman I'm so sorry that you've had such a crappy time lately.

Erin & Ryan Sig
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2008
Thu, 08-28-2008 - 9:11pm
Thank you to all you ladies for all of your support!
I think things are already starting to look up. I'm trying to find comfort in the little victories. Like the very talented baker in my area has officially decided that she wants to not only apprentice me, but she was so impressed with my Rolling Stones Forty Licks cake, that she wants to actually have me be a cake decorator for her!!!! After weeks of obssesing that I'm not good enough, that gave me self esteem boost I needed! Hopefully I can hang on to this feeling for a while. BUT I'm letting August go, and am starting anew for September. Happy school dayz Susan and Erin!

wedding2-1.jpg picture by Sbaltozer


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