Hurting a lot-it's the hormones

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2008
Hurting a lot-it's the hormones
20
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 6:41pm

Hi all,


I need a virtual hug.....the hormonal low from the miscarriage is hitting me like a truck and all I want to do is weep. I am so down in the dumps, can barely make it to work in the morning. I know it will pass and I have herbs and acupuncture to help me along with good friends and family but man, it really really does something horrible to your endorphins, this mc....Can't stand it. I have a perpetual lump in my throat and can't stop tearing up. And I'm being a total bitch to DH. What do you suggest???

 


34 years old, Dh is 38; DX - luteal phase defect; 2 failed Clomid-IUI cycles (2nd time was chemical pregnancy); 3rd Clomid-IUI cycle resulted in BFP, but I miscarried at 18 dpo. Now doing TCM.Photobucket

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2008
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 6:52pm

(((((HUGS)))))


  

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2008
Tue, 09-16-2008 - 6:55pm
(((((HUGS))))) I've never had a miscarriage before but I have lost a child. All I can say that you are in my thoughts and we are all here for you. You just have to take it one day at a time.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2008
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 9:25am

((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))) Caren!


What do you do for a living? When I MC, I was lucky enough to be traveling all the time, and I worked with ALL MEN, so whenever I felt the need, I'd cry in my car, or when some one asked me if I was ok, O MAN did I loose it, I'd just go on my marry way and just bawl!!!!! I do know that your emotional fragility has alot to do with hormones, but my suggestion is to REALLY feel and mourn. This is an extremely tough time, feel sad, feel angry, hate the world!! The more you recognize your genuine feelings and deal with them the faster you will heal. I know this was a biochemical pregnancy, and mine was a full out MC at 16 weeks, but it's still ok to mourn, and it's ok to never forget!!! To this day, I've never gotten over it. It's like a scar; at first it hurt so much I couldn't move or function, then over time it slowly began to heal and now

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2008
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 10:58am

dear caren,

(((hugs))) i know i can't say anything to make any of this better, but you're not alone. after my failed ivfs (they never called it a m/c, but 1st beta was good, 2nd going down), i found that getting a massage helped to calm me a bit. other than that, i took some comfort in thinking about our next steps. i'm so sorry you're going through this.

ana


TTC since Sept '06
Diagnosed w/ PCOS, DH diagnosed with azoospermia Dec '06, TESA Mar '07
IVF/ICSI/AZH#1 Aug'07, BFN (6 usable eggs, 5 embies, 2 transferred, 1st beta=18, 2nd beta=12, 0 made it to blast to freeze)
IVF/ICSI#2:retrieval Nov'07, FET sched Jan'08, no embryos to transfer (23 usable eggs, 12 embies, 0 made it to transfer)
IVF/ICSI#3: retrieval Mar'08, FET May'08, BFN (13 usable eggs, 7 fertilized w/ DH sperm= 0 blasts, 6 fertlized w/ DS=3 blasts, all 3 transferred, 1st beta=74, 2nd beta=64, 3rd beta=42)
1st cycle IUI/clomid/donor sperm postponed due to lack of follicular growth on 100mg clomidx5days. 2nd cycle: Clomid (200mg CD5-9), IUI 9/9, waiting...

ana

mom to beautiful baby lia.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2008
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 6:36pm

Thanks, Roman.


You always write so beautifully - I feel like I am reading a professional writer when I read your posts!! I feel much less sad today but so angry..I decide to see my ob/gyn for her opinion on the whole thing and she kind of agrees with RE that I should maybe consider IVF and should only do no more than two additional Clomid or injectible cycles. I thought that the fact that I got pg was a good sign, but she said that unless the bean sticks, it's not really a good sign. I am terrified of IVF, though. So for now I am doing herbs and acupuncture. But I am so FREAKING SICK of this whole roller coaster.


I work with almost all women in my department. My boss keeps asking me if I'm ok. I don't cry at work, but I'm sure I look like hell....


Thanks again.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2008
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 7:09pm

HUGS CAREN!!!


I recommend taking a personal day from work. Go pamper yourself. Go shopping, go get a mani/pedi, or just rent some movies and relax. I wish I could come hang out and eat chocolate or whatever it is you eat when you are sad!! Just know we are all thinking of you!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-05-2008
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 8:16pm
AWW Caren ((((((HUGS))))))
I would be so angry too and I was with my MC! IVF is such a HUGE decision and I personally am afraid of ever having to make that decision. I'm with Kristy, take a day, seriously, I love a good cry!!! The one thing I regret from my MC is I went back to work too soon. I knew I needed another week, but I thought getting out would help, NOPE! Take all the time you need and CRY CRY CRY!!!! ((((((((HUGS)))))))))

wedding2-1.jpg picture by Sbaltozer


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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2007
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 8:19pm
Hugs, Caren!!!!!!!!!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2008
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 9:32pm

Thanks, all! You are

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2008
Thu, 09-18-2008 - 6:52pm
hi caren,
it's ok not to feel like crying. i've found that at some point the flood gates open up, and it can be really cathartic to tire yourself out crying. one RE i know said that it is a good sign to be able to get as far as a positive beta, even if it doesn't stick.

ana


TTC since Sept '06
Diagnosed w/ PCOS, DH diagnosed with azoospermia Dec '06, TESA Mar '07
IVF/ICSI/AZH#1 Aug'07, BFN (6 usable eggs, 5 embies, 2 transferred, 1st beta=18, 2nd beta=12, 0 made it to blast to freeze)
IVF/ICSI#2:retrieval Nov'07, FET sched Jan'08, no embryos to transfer (23 usable eggs, 12 embies, 0 made it to transfer)
IVF/ICSI#3: retrieval Mar'08, FET May'08, BFN (13 usable eggs, 7 fertilized w/ DH sperm= 0 blasts, 6 fertlized w/ DS=3 blasts, all 3 transferred, 1st beta=74, 2nd beta=64, 3rd beta=42)
1st cycle IUI/clomid/donor sperm postponed due to lack of follicular growth on 100mg clomidx5days. 2nd cycle: Clomid (200mg CD5-9), IUI 9/9, waiting...

ana

mom to beautiful baby lia.

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