Dreaded 2ww (loss mentioned)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
Dreaded 2ww (loss mentioned)
10
Mon, 11-10-2008 - 2:06am

Just a quick shout out--we had our 5th transfer on November 4th (yes, election day--at least I was distracted!). We stuck 4 of the little buggers in this time--I'm through messing around!

We find out on the 15th of the month. I keep remembering back to last time, when we got the BFP, and wondering if we'll get lucky again. The biggest issue is I can't predict what my emotional state will be, and DH doesn't seem to understand why. We talk about it, of course, and things are fine. But he evidently has this whole logic tree worked out in his head, with ifs and thens. Now we have a better idea of how the other's brain works, I guess! For me, I'm like, um, there are hormones involved and I just don't know.

Overall I feel pretty calm, though. Tired a lot from the progesterone, but I don't feel the freak out I used to. I think I've had enough practice after all this time that I am finally a little bit used to it. I'm not sure how I feel about that!

So, in a week I'll either post an elated message or a deflated one. No one knows but the little bundles of joy and worry currently bouncing around in my belly!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2004
Mon, 11-10-2008 - 4:44am
I hope you get your BFP((((HUGS)))

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2008
Mon, 11-10-2008 - 8:01am
GL kris....I have my fingers and toes crossed for a BFP for you!!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2008
Mon, 11-10-2008 - 8:30am
GL and Baby dust to you Kris! All is crossed for a BFP!!

~Christine~


TTC since 6/2007. Dx blocked tubes, PCOS, Factor V Leiden.

~Christine~


TTC since 6/2007. 
IVF #1 Jan 2009 - BFN
IVF# 2  April 2009 - BFN
IVF# 3 July

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2008
Mon, 11-10-2008 - 8:51am
Good Luck, I am sending tons of sticky bean vibes, and P&PT for you and your beans.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2008
Mon, 11-10-2008 - 12:24pm
I am keeping everything crossed for a bfp.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2008
Mon, 11-10-2008 - 5:51pm
i'm sending you lots of sticky vibes!!!!! oh, and there's no way you can keep yourself calm and logical between the hormones and the stress of IF, along with the possibility of finally getting a BFP. enough to make anyone crazy...so many people drop out of treatment because it's just so much...us strong ones are the ones who go through it. hang in there in the 2ww and i hope you get some good news soon!

ana


TTC since Sept '06. Diagnosed w/ PCOS, DH diagnosed with azoospermia Dec '06, TESA Mar '07
IVF/ICSI/AZH#1 Aug'07, BFN (6 usable eggs, 5 embies, 2 transferred, 1st beta=18, 2nd beta=12, 0 made it to blast to freeze)
IVF/ICSI#2:retrieval Nov'07 (w/ fresh TESA), FET sched Jan'08, no embryos to transfer (23 usable eggs, 12 embies, 0 made it to transfer)
IVF/ICSI#3: retrieval Mar'08, FET May'08, BFN (13 usable eggs, 7 fertilized w/ DH sperm= 0 blasts, 6 fertlized w/ DS=3 blasts, all 3 transferred, 1st beta=74, 2nd beta=64, 3rd beta=42)
1st cycle IUI/clomid/donor sperm postponed due to lack of follicular growth on 100mg clomidx5days.

ana

mom to beautiful baby lia.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2008
Tue, 11-11-2008 - 10:52pm

Best of luck to you!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-18-2007
Wed, 11-12-2008 - 12:14pm

Kris - Lots and lots of luck.

Mom to Silas Walker, born July 2009, thanks to IVF. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2008
Wed, 11-12-2008 - 3:24pm

KJ,


i'm sorry it's been a hard day. i totally understand. i really think the 2ww is the hardest. i'm sending lots of sticky vibes!

ana


TTC since Sept '06. Diagnosed w/ PCOS, DH diagnosed with azoospermia Dec '06, TESA Mar '07
IVF/ICSI/AZH#1 Aug'07, BFN (6 usable eggs, 5 embies, 2 transferred, 1st beta=18, 2nd beta=12, 0 made it to blast to freeze)
IVF/ICSI#2:retrieval Nov'07 (w/ fresh TESA), FET sched Jan'08, no embryos to transfer (23 usable eggs, 12 embies, 0 made it to transfer)
IVF/ICSI#3: retrieval Mar'08, FET May'08, BFN (13 usable eggs, 7 fertilized w/ DH sperm= 0 blasts, 6 fertlized w/ DS=3 blasts, all 3 transferred, 1st beta=74, 2nd beta=64, 3rd beta=42)
1st cycle IUI/clomid/donor sperm postponed due to lack of follicular growth on 100mg clomidx5days.

ana

mom to beautiful baby lia.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2007
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 12:11am

The first one was the hardest for me (except the last time when I did get a BFP and then things...stopped). Then again, I have a friend who got BFP her very first IVF. It's so random; there's no reason nor rhyme to any of this.

I am driving myself quietly insane waiting! Today I completely forgot about a really important meeting (even when the substitute teacher came in for me--I still didn't get it) and had to rush to get there. And then when I got there, I forgot the report I was supposed to talk about!! I find myself taking wrong turns, unable to concentrate for very long, etc. It's like my brain has been replaced by a goldfish's.

I am alternately ecstatic that my boobs hurt, and devastated that I feel a little crampy. Saturday had better get here fast!!!!

Speaking of, my DH and I have agreed that Saturday we'll take the day and go to the beach, go out to eat, play with the dogs, and spend some time together. Regardless of the outcome, then I know we have some time scheduled just for us independent of me being pregnant. That's the one thing I have learned--I can't hinge everything on my getting pregnant. I have to know that life is going to go on one way or the other, that I can and will be happy, and that life is sweet and good even if it doesn't go quite the way I imagined it would.

Good luck to you, as well!

kris