DH.....errrrrrrrrrr

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2008
DH.....errrrrrrrrrr
11
Sat, 11-22-2008 - 11:44am

I am so mad at my DH I could just spit fire.....


Yesterday was my Nephew's (his brothers sons) 3rd birthday party.....well as all of you ladies know, it is hard to go to childrens birthday parties....it hurts, and it reminds you of what you don't have....and may not ever have....So I decided that I just couldn't handle it, and wasn't going to go....DH was still going....he was annoyed at me for not going, but after I explained it too him I thought he understood.....So I asked him to tell everyone that I was sorry I couldn't make it, I was feeling ill......So he gets home and I asked how everything went.....he says it was fine....I told everyone you couldn't make it because you where out Christmas Shopping.........ummmmm what.....you told them I couldn't come because I was shopping.....are you kidding me.....you seriously told them that......yep....that's what he told them....so now I'm sure his family thinks that I'm a total jerk.....I mean seriously how rude is it that I didn't go because I was shopping.....OMG I am horrified....I would have preferred he told them the real reason at least then they probably would have understood.....So anyways I get mad and go off on a tangent about how could he do that....and he says, well no one cared.....ummmm yea like anyone was going to tell you what a jerk your wife is for thinking shopping is more important then her nephew's bday party.....


I am so mad and embarrassed....I don't even know what to do....I feel like he did this just because he was mad I didn't come.....There have been lots of times that he didn't attend a function with me just because he didn't want to, or because he wanted to watch football....and I have managed to go without him, and give an excuse that didn't make him look like a jerk.....this is the only time in our entire relationship that I have ever asked him to do this for me.....


We are currently not speaking to eachother.....and I haven't spoke to him since I yelled at him last night.....I really don't know what to do....I'm so mad and hurt that I don't know what he can do to make it better.....I haven't been this upset with him in years......I feel kind of betrayed.....is that wrong of me....should I just get over this like it's not a big deal?  am I over reacting?

 


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Jeanne (30) DH (32) TTC our first since Sept. 2006....MFI DH's has zero motility....low testosterone....DH is currently on Clomid trying to increase his testosterone and in turn hopefully increase his motility!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2008
Sat, 11-22-2008 - 11:58am

hi jeanne,


(((hugs))) i don't think you're overreacting. IF makes you feel so vulnerable.

ana

mom to beautiful baby lia.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2008
Sat, 11-22-2008 - 12:33pm

Hi Jeanne,

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2008
Sat, 11-22-2008 - 12:34pm
AAWWW sweetie ( ( ( ( H U G S ) ) ) ) You aren't overreacting. It's perfectly OK for you not to go to the B-day party if it was too hard for you. I would certainly understand if someone didn't come to mine (if I had a small child) because it was too hard for them. I do think it was insensitive of him to tell them something other than what you had asked him to. Sometimes I don't think they think all that well anyway. I agree with Ana and hope you can talk about it.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2008
Sat, 11-22-2008 - 7:31pm


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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2008
Sat, 11-22-2008 - 8:09pm

ugh!! I would have been LIVID!! What a dumb reason he gave!! Have you started speaking yet?


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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2008
Sat, 11-22-2008 - 11:51pm
(((((HUGS))))) you are totally not wrong for being mad at him.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2008
Mon, 11-24-2008 - 11:33am

Hi Jeanne,


I don't think that you are overreacting...your feelings about not being able to go the party and not wanting to announce why were painful enough to deal with, without even adding the lie

 

Angela

Me 32, C 34. Toge

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2008
Mon, 11-24-2008 - 11:51am
I can understand why you are upset. He probably just wasn't thinking when he said that. Is there someone you feel close enough in his family that you can tell them the real reason why you didn't go?

Kelly


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2008
Mon, 11-24-2008 - 3:07pm

Thank you all for your support :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2008
Mon, 11-24-2008 - 7:31pm

hi jeanne,

i'm glad you guys were able to talk it out and come to some sort of a resolution. hopefully he'll be more sensitive next time!

ana


TTC since Sept '06. Diagnosed w/ PCOS, DH diagnosed with azoospermia Dec '06, TESA Mar '07. IVF/ICSI/AZH#1 Aug'07, BFN (6 usable eggs, 5 embies, 2 transferred, 1st beta=18, 2nd beta=12, 0 made it to blast to freeze). IVF/ICSI#2:retrieval Nov'07 (w/ fresh TESA), FET sched Jan'08, no embryos to transfer (23 usable eggs, 12 embies, 0 made it to transfer). IVF/ICSI#3: retrieval Mar'08, FET May'08, BFN (13 usable eggs, 7 fertilized w/ DH sperm= 0 blasts, 6 fertlized w/ DS=3 blasts, all 3 transferred, 1st beta=74, 2nd beta=64, 3rd beta=42). 1st cycle IUI/clomid/donor sperm postponed due to lack of follicular growth on 100mg clomidx5days.

ana

mom to beautiful baby lia.

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