Egg Donation

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2008
Egg Donation
33
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 11:52am

This is not really a vent….just thought it was eye-opening to me.


There is an egg donation office near my work and a co-worker tells me that a lady from that office told her she could get her $10,000 for her eggs.  So needless to say, this co-worker says she is going to do it…she's all starry-eyed with $$.  This girl doesn’t know about me TTC or any of the IF treatments that I’ve been through.  I asked her if she did any research or if she knows anything about the egg donation process.  She said the lady gave her paperwork to fill out and told her she would just need some b/w to determine blood type and that she would just have to do a couple of shots…they’re no big deal…she could even come to that office and they could do it for her…the whole process would take a couple of weeks…and that’s all! 


I’m not at all comfortable talking with this girl that I’ve been through this process but I didn’t want her getting into it without knowing more before so I told her that I knew about it from someone.  I told her that she would need to be on track with the lady receiving the eggs (she thought they just take the eggs whenever) so she would probably need to be on BCP or another shot a few weeks before.  I told her she would probably be on 1-3 shots a day depending on the plan and where she is in the cycle.  She had no idea about possible daily ultrasounds (yes down there!) and b/w.  She had no idea about overstimulation.  She had no idea about the anesthesia for the ER or how many eggs they take (she thought 1 or 2) and she didn’t know where they took the eggs from.  Plus, she was appalled that the lady receiving the eggs got to pick the doctor!  I told her of course she does…after all they are the one’s paying for it and hoping for a baby.


I find out later that day that another girl in the office was asked to be an egg donor as well.  The first girl started talking about how she was going to do the egg donation a few times and she was going to quit working and just live off of the $.  The other girl says that she would do it not for the $, but because there are so many people that want babies and can’t have them.  So the first girl says oh yeah that’s why I would do it too!  Sure :)


So a few days later, a few of us from work went out to lunch.  The girl talks about how her boyfriend says that if she does the egg donation he is going to leave her because he thinks it is unethical and if God wanted people to have a baby then they would by themselves.  She didn't like earlier when I told her that she shouldn’t have sex during the process if she didn’t want to become pg and even have the chance of multiples.  I guess at least she won’t have to worry about that if her boyfriend leaves her! :)


Another girl asked if she was worried about using up her own eggs since women are born with only a certain amount.  The girl says oh no women have an unlimited # of eggs and guys are the ones that have only a certain amount of sperm!  Geez ladies…can you imagine with the amount of you know what that most guys have done as teenagers…there would be no sperm left for us! :)  Even though I know doing egg donation a few times wouldn’t lower her amount of eggs to any significant level, I was still surprised at what she was saying.


By the end of lunch, I find out this girl is a heavy pot smoker!  She said she didn’t write this on her paperwork or that she takes anti-depressants because she didn’t want to be rejected.  The lady at the egg donation office told her she already has a couple that wants her eggs!  That was fast.  I guess this office must be short on donors.


This has me thinking about egg donation in a new light.  If I ever possibly ended up having to go down that route, it makes me want to try to find a known donor if possible.  I guess it is just hard for me to know now that I would have to trust someone with possibly a future child of mine and know that I have no control over whether they’re being honest or not.  


Just thought I would share this…I was stunned by it.  I guess I just always assumed the egg donor cared and protected the little eggies like we do and that the egg donation office would be more responsible.


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ME (28), DH (29)  TTC #1 since March 2006. Dx: PCOS variant
3/06 to 3/07 TTC on own; 4/07: Clomid 50mg-O,BFN; 5/07: Clomid 50mg-O,BFN; 6/07: Clomid 50mg & Metformin-O,BFN; 7/07: 1st RE appt; 8/07: IUI #1-Femara(3-7) & Ovidrel-BFN; 9/07: IUI #2-Femara(3-7) & Ovidrel-BFN; 10/07: IUI #3-Femara(3-7)& Ovidrel-BFP!  12/14/07-m/c @7w.  Testing revealed chromosomally normal girl. Forced break until 3/08: IUI #4-Femara(3-7) with Follistim boosting 75 units(6,8,9) & Ovidrel-BFN; BCPx2wks to treat resulting cyst; 4/08: IUI #5 with only Follistim 75(3-7), more than 4 follicles on u/s, converted to IVF #1, 7 of 10 fertilized with ICSI, 2 transferred-BFN; 6/08: IUI #5-Femara(3-7) with Follistim alternating 50 & 75 units(3-7) & Ovidrel-BFN; 7/08 thru 9/08: IVF #2 with BCP, Lupron, Follistim 50 am/pm, ER-10 eggs, 5 out of 5 fertilized ICSI, 3 out of 5 fertilized standard, 2 transferred-BFN; 10/08: IUI #6-Femara(3-5 only), Follistim 50 units (6-11), 3 to 4 dominant follicles on u/s, Dr. wanted to cxl cycle due to chance of multiples but we continued on-BFP!  Betas went down :( 
Where we are now: IUI #7-Femara (3-5 only) & Follistim (6,7,8,9) with Metformin, u/s & E2 on 12/02-follies growing! 12/03-Ovidrel trigger, 12/05-IUI, Now in the 2ww 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2008
In reply to: grace1107
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 12:04pm

Wow! That is crazy to me that these girls are taking it all so lightly. Especially since they are lying about their "habits". I wonder if the agency does drug testing? I'd be upset if I paid $10K to get eggs from a person who didn't feel it was necessary to be honest about it. I guess she has no feelings about anything other than the money, so sad.

I bet you were ready to scream when she said that about the eggs and the sperm though. Made me laugh to myself.

Kelly


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2008
In reply to: grace1107
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 12:13pm

Wow.


When I was at the RE waiting, the office staff was talking about where to refer the calls they get about donating sperm and eggs...they were saying they get up to 10 calls a day and the people calling sound like it is all so easy, a big joke, and they always ask how much money they will get paid. Then the head office lady came out and explained they need to have those people call a certain social worker they work with because she does all the initial contacts, qualifying, etc. They said she is pretty good at figuring out someone's intention for doing it.

 

Angela

Me 32, C 34. Toge

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2008
In reply to: grace1107
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 12:15pm

You would think the agency would do a drug test!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2008
In reply to: grace1107
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 12:21pm
wow, grace...sounds totally nuts! i guess they're really trying to recruit. i don't want to think about this issue too much, since we used a sperm donor (which, of course, is a much easier donation!). i think you did the right thing by educating them but not feeling like you had to disclose.

ana


TTC since Sept '06. Diagnosed w/ PCOS, DH diagnosed with azoospermia Dec '06, TESA Mar '07. IVF/ICSI/AZH#1 Aug'07, BFN (6 usable eggs, 5 embies, 2 transferred, 1st beta=18, 2nd beta=12, 0 made it to blast to freeze). IVF/ICSI#2:retrieval Nov'07 (w/ fresh TESA), FET sched Jan'08, no embryos to transfer (23 usable eggs, 12 embies, 0 made it to transfer). IVF/ICSI#3: retrieval Mar'08, FET May'08, BFN (13 usable eggs, 7 fertilized w/ DH sperm= 0 blasts, 6 fertlized w/ DS=3 blasts, all 3 transferred, 1st beta=74, 2nd beta=64, 3rd beta=42). 1st cycle IUI/clomid/donor sperm postponed due to lack of follicular growth on 100mg clomidx5days.

ana

mom to beautiful baby lia.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2008
In reply to: grace1107
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 12:28pm

I too hope that Angela...part of me wants to call that agency anonymously!


I would think that there would be a more rigorous process to become an egg donor.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2008
In reply to: grace1107
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 12:31pm

I'm going to further shock you by adding that the girl may be paid $10,000 but the couple using that service pays an average of $25,000.00 for the egg donation.


Also what people say and what actually occurs are different.


When

Franklin and Callan

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2008
In reply to: grace1107
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 12:32pm

Wow Grace,

~Christine~


TTC since 6/2007. 
IVF #1 Jan 2009 - BFN
IVF# 2  April 2009 - BFN
IVF# 3 July

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2008
In reply to: grace1107
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 12:39pm

Hi Ana,


Hopefully now after talking with them


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2008
In reply to: grace1107
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 12:51pm

Gabrielle,


That's what I hoping...that she's going to go through a more stringent workup later on.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2008
In reply to: grace1107
Fri, 12-12-2008 - 12:57pm

Wow, Grace.

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