Another baby has arrived
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|Thu, 10-22-2009 - 10:10pm|
Friends of ours just had a baby girl. This couple becoming pg and having a baby brings back somber memories for us. DH and I went to their wedding the day after we found out that our baby had died. I had been looking forward to their wedding for a long time, but neither of us felt like going to the wedding after what happened and DH really didn't want us to go. I felt bad to miss it with only one day notice that we wouldn't be there. They were good friends, but I didn't want to tell them about the m/c if we didn't go and I couldn't see giving an excuse, so we went. We managed to make it through the wedding and reception, but not without shedding tears, especially during the ceremony when they were asked if they would accept children from God. We remembered the same thing from our wedding. It was very surreal to be at their wedding and know that I was still carrying our child, but that it was no longer growing.
So, when they announced their pregnancy and now that they have a little girl, I'm reminded of all of that. They didn't find out the gender of the baby, so of course when DH found out that it was a girl, it made him feel sad (he always said he wanted girls when we started TTC and testing showed that our first baby was a girl).
Not only am I feeling the same 'happy for them, sad for us' feelings that come along, but I'm reminded of our losses and in so many ways of everything that happened around the time their wedding. And that even though it's been almost 2 years since their wedding and our first loss, we're still waiting for our little one while others seem to be moving along in life.
They invited us to a get together next weekend for both of their birthdays and to celebrate their daughter's arrival. At first, I thought it would be nice to visit, but then I realized that I don't know if I can do it. :(
Me (29), DH (30) since March 2006.
4/07 & 5/07 & 6/07: Clomid 50mg - All BFN
7/07: 1st RE appt
8/07 & 9/07: IUI #1 & #2 with Femara - Both BFN
10/07: IUI #3 with Femara - BFP!, m/c :(
3/08: IUI #4 with Femara & Follistim - BFN
4/08: IUI #5 with Follistim, converted to IVF #1,10 eggs, 7 fertilized ICSI, 2 transferred - BFN
6/08: IUI #5 with Femara & Follistim - BFN
7/08 to 9/08: IVF #2,10 eggs, 5 fertilized ICSI, 3 fertilized std, 2 transferred - BFN
10/08: IUI #6 with Femara & Follistim - BFP!, loss :(
11/08: IUI #7 with Femara & Follistim - BFN
1/09: New RE appt
2/09 to 3/09: IVF #3,14 eggs, 8 of 10 eggs fertilized ICSI, day 5 ET of 2 blasts - BFP!, loss :(
DH's chromosome testing abnormal, moving forward with DS IVF instead of PGD.
8/09 to 9/09: IVF #4, chose to cancel due to drop in estrogen after 10 days of stims
Where we are now: IVF - BCPs until 10/22, Start Lupron on 10/18, U/S and E2 appt on 10/27