Seriously?!?!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2007
Seriously?!?!
15
Sat, 07-24-2010 - 11:04pm

I'm just venting here..so please forgive me.


I was talking to a friend (not a close friend) about trying for another baby. Of course after she asked what was taking so long with #2. *sigh* I finally told her that we had a lot of difficulty conceiving our DS and that we infact have been trying for #2 since DH was about 9 months old. We were returning to the fertility doctor.


Her response?


"Well...have you just tried the old fashion way of making babies? Just have a lot of sex."


I could really and truly slapped this woman, if I were a more violent person. SERIOUSLY? Oh thank you "doctor". That's our problem. We just have to have a lot of sex and here I thought the stork just kept getting lost. Honest to goodness.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2009
In reply to: baby_sass
Sat, 07-24-2010 - 11:23pm


Oh, I would have really lost it with her. That comment is so rude, uncaring, uncaring, and frankly quite patronizing. I get a lot of "just relax, you are too tense" comments and think those are equally horrifying and upsetting. I'm really sorry you opened up to someone who had such an unthoughtful response. I don't know how you responded, but I hope it got the point across that her comment was unacceptable.

Hugs to you- what a rotten conversation to have with a so-called friend.

Andrea

Lilypie Maternity tickers


May Baby

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-02-2009
In reply to: baby_sass
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 12:48am

I'm sorry you got such a stupid response.

Tamar

TTC #1 since Feb '09 with Unexplained Infertility: SA's all ok; b/w and HSG ok; Lap Mar '10 - mild endo on outside of right tube/uterus removed but not considered eno

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2007
In reply to: baby_sass
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 12:53pm

Oh dear! I can't believe she'd ask that! Well d'uh! It's really surprising (should it be?) that so many people don't think before they say something and end up asking or saying really dumb or insensitive things!


The "mental" slaps have definitely helped..lol

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2007
In reply to: baby_sass
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 12:57pm

It is patronizing and rude. I'm not an idiot. I bet when it comes down to it, I know more about reporduction, ovulation, blah blah blah then she does!
I too get the "just relax" comments..and hate those as well. You know, if it was that easy, I'd have 10 babies by now. I'm the most relaxed, laid back, no stress kinda girl! haha


It was a terrible response when I opened up to her and not one that I expected. I'd much rather surround myself with people who don't patronize me, are supportive and try to "get" it...that's what I need.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2010
In reply to: baby_sass
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 8:22pm

Uggh, I cannot STAND people like that! I want to be like "Gee thanks I had not thought of that. I have been stressing and trying

Dixie


"Even miracles take a little time." ~ Fairy Godmother: Cinderella


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2007
In reply to: baby_sass
Sun, 07-25-2010 - 10:06pm
Oh. my. Gosh. Thank you so much for the laugh. That is awesome. I just might spit that out if anyone ever suggests that to me again!!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-28-2009
In reply to: baby_sass
Mon, 07-26-2010 - 9:19am
OMG! I had the same thing happen yesterday...with a good friend...who knows what we've gone through!!! She started by saying "wow, why are you so broken out"...um...cause I have to take hormones every month for the past year, not to mention the stress!!! and then says "you guys just need to pretend like you are in high school and go crazy"...oh, you mean we have to have sex to get pregnant!?! Well, jeez, I wish I would've known that easy answer 3 years ago!!!! ARG!

-Jamie


Me 33, DH 36. TTC since November 2007. Possible miscarriage in January of 2008 (too early for BFP, but all symptoms point to miscarriage). Normal SA in Feb 2009. Later told low motility. HSG showed large (50% of uterus) fundal fibroid in Feb 2009. Hysteroscopically removed in March 2009. Tried to concieve naturally until August 2009. Repeat HSG was normal.



  • 08/09 - 01/10 6 cycles of Clomid and timed BD, all BFN
  • IUI #1 = 01/13/10, BFN.
  • IUI #2 = 3/11/10, BFP! 03/26/10, beta 1 = 57.5, beta 2 (4 days after 1) = 661. Ectopic in right tube. Lap to remove 4/3/10.

-Jamie

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2010
In reply to: baby_sass
Mon, 07-26-2010 - 11:27am

Ugh!

Kelly (31) DH (32) TTC Since June 2009 August 2007 - Myomectomy - removed large fibroid on back of uterus January 2010 - HSG reveals "possible" blocked left tube March 2010 - First RE visit (PCOS secondary to CAH diagnosed) April 2010 - October 2010
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2007
In reply to: baby_sass
Mon, 07-26-2010 - 1:23pm
Well...there we have it. We need to have sex. That's been our problem all along! Who knew?!!? *groans*
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2010
In reply to: baby_sass
Mon, 07-26-2010 - 2:33pm

Hey ladies,


Me - (Amanda 27) My dh-- 26 We have been ttc # 1 for 3yrs 5mths My dh has severe oligospermia, Ivf with icsi is our only option. Ivf # 1--- failed Ivf # 2--- failed Ivf # 3-- hopefully in March 2013 at a new clinic!

 

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