Cycle buddy? Ret/trans Nov 3

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2003
Cycle buddy? Ret/trans Nov 3
26
Sun, 08-17-2003 - 11:11am
Hi,

I had my first visit with the RE last Wednesday and he can't fit me into the September cycle, so I will start meds week of Oct 13 and I am scheduled for retrieval/transfer week of Nov 3rd. Anyone else out there on the same schedule? This is my first attempt, and I am very hopeful! My DH is very stressed (worse than me). Any advice on how to calm him?

Alli

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2003
Tue, 08-19-2003 - 1:33pm
Hi Alli,

I am doing my IVF #1 as well. I don't have any words of wisdom for calming your DH, I am afraid each of us has our own ways of dealing with it, and hopefully once you start the actual process some of his stress will be relieved. Do you know what is he worried most about? My DH was worried about something bad happening to me, he says he loves me more than the baby we don't have. After we talked to RE, and he explained the risks (which sound fairly negligeable, except potential severe hyperstimulation, which is not common)my DH is feeling better.

All the best to you!

Kasia

Kasia (34), DH (34) TTC #1 since m/c in 2000 2 IUI/Letrozole
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2003
Wed, 08-20-2003 - 2:15pm
Hello Alli-

I also missed doing the sept. cycle (barely). I had my second IUI on 8/01 and it didn't work. DH and I decided to stop messing around and are hoping the odds are going to be better for us with IVF. We have "unexplained infertility", so that leaves things wide open.

DH's counts are on the low end of normal and so far everything seems ok with me. Had a HSG and everything spilled ok---LAP found mild endo that was removed.....so here we go.....

We have our consult and BW on 8/28 and are beginning things on 10/17. Right now I am on BCP to shrink some follies down and to get ready for the IVF.

I would like to be able to share experiences--let me know if you are interested. I am nervous and scared at the same time. I feel like I am putting all of my eggs in one basket.....no pun intended.

Hope all goes well and take care of DH. Sometimes it is easy to forget that they get scared/emotional about things, but lean on each other and it will work out.

Take care,

Karen

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2003
Thu, 08-21-2003 - 7:09am
Hi Karen,

I would love to have someone to go through this with! DH told me he justs wants to have a baby the normal way. I think that is the worst part! I am the one with the problem. When I was 13 I had a dermoid cyst on my right ovary, they took the cyst, ovary and my appendix. I found out through HSG on July 2 that there is no spillage on the left :(. They suspect adhesions and my choices were surgery (with 30% success) or IVF.

We chose IVF, since we may resort to that after surgery anyway and I am 35 (DH 33) been trying since '99. New doc is great, found the issue in 3 months. Anyway I have a cervical bacterial test tomorrow. DH has had no semenalysis yet, but we had a Huhner test in 2001 which showed many motile swimmers, so we don't think there's a problem. (His tests scheduled for Sept.)

I told people at work. I am really bad about keeping secrets and I want lower stress. My friends all know I have been trying since '99 anyway, so it's not a great shock. Everyone is really supportive.

I went on one of those sites for women who had been trying for over a year, and they were awful! Saying mean things about people who are pregnant and how jealous they are, so I just lurked, but never posted. I think everything happens for a reason and that we were given this challenge because we can deal with it! Baby dust to you (sorry for being so long-winded).

Alli

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2003
Thu, 08-21-2003 - 7:13am
Hi Kasia,

DH just wants to have a baby the normal way. Going to RE made him more upset (reality set in) but made me feel much better since we actually have a plan. Thanks for the encouragement and baby dust to you!

Alli

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2003
Thu, 08-21-2003 - 12:48pm
Alli-

Yes, wouldn't haveing a baby the natural way be wonderful.......but, reality is after three years of trying...IVF...here we come!

DH (33) and I(32) have Unexplained Infertility. What does that mean~~~ We have been trying to conceive for well over three years. The problem was we moved quite a bit (3 times) for his job, so getting serious with an RE took us a while. This move (now DH is with another company, so hopefully we won't move as much) we started working with an RE right away and they are great. We'be been working with them since Sept. of last year.

I had an HSG (spilling fine), a LAP (mild endo removed) and 2 failed IUI's. DH has very slight MFI and that's all we have. DH and I decided to go with the better odds and jump to the IVF. At least this way we MAY get more answers.

I go in on 8/28 for our IVF consult and BW. Nervous, scared, excited...how many other emotions are there? Hoping this works, not wanting to think about if it doesn't.....

Initially, DH and I didn't tell people what we were going through. A little bit of it was feeling that there was something "wrong" with us. How can we not be able to do something that 13 year olds seem to be able to do while drinking the tap water? We got over that and started including people. I now feel that the more people we have praying for us, the better. Sometimes that is hard also, because you get people who just don't understand how emotional things are and how sensitive you can be (i.e.--guy friend with two beautiful girls who calls out of the blue in three months and first thing he says is, "are you pregnant yet?"). But I just am glad that they don't have to go through this, because it is hard.

What protocall are you on? Looks like I'll be doing injectables (Gonal-F, Lupron, HCG, Progesterone) and Doxycycline, Medrol, and Tetracycline. The last are antibiotics I think to make sure we are healthy before we go in for this.

Sounds like you made the right choice for the IVF. I believe my DR said that during the retrieval procedure, they can take care of certain unexpected surprises (cysts). Sounds like they get a better picture with this procedure. We'll cross our fingers (and toes).

I have been posting at fertilitext also. Kind of found this one and that one at the same time. I have read at several, but as you say, some are VERY negative. I like the group at fertilitext.....very supportive. I don't need negativity to bring me down---happiness is a lot healthier. And I want to hear about success stories---gives me hope. I would like to have dialogue with you----I am really needing someone who is going through this who has the same questions I do and may know some answers, so hopefully we'll be able to keep it up.

Now I must apologize for being long winded...... thanks for listening and baby dust to you and everyone!!!!

Karen

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2003
Thu, 08-21-2003 - 12:57pm
Kasia-

I just wanted to say hello and wish you the best for your IVF. Hope I can be supportive to you in any way and lots of baby dust and positive vibes to you.....

Karen

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2003
Fri, 08-22-2003 - 7:05am
Hi Karen,

I am totally with you about the people who make rude comments! DH has a construction company and it never fails to amaze me that the people he encounters are so rude! Even people who know we started trying over 3 years ago have the audacity to ask if we're pregnant. I am an engineer at a pharmaceutical company and no one at work has ever asked me anything of the sort! Friends/acquaitnances are a different story.

We were at a wedding about 2 weeks ago, and DH's former employee started in, so we ended up gong into the IVF thing at someone's wedding. That was the last thing I wanted to discuss- to make matters worse, the couple who was getting married has a 1-year-old who was in the wedding, and the bride had a 4 year-old from a previous relationship, so how inadequate am I after 11 years of marriage, not to produce one off-spring?

Once we told these people, they felt bad, were sympathetic, then seem supportive, but I am always afraid that people are making fun of me. I know it's stupid, but that is the worst part! I try to tell myself I don't care what others think, but really I do. I have a wonderful marriage, a beautiful home (which has 4 bedrooms...) a terrific career, but sometimes I am still unhappy. It is so ridiculous.

Anyway, don't be nervous about your appointment with the RE. Mine was wonderful. He explained everything in detail, he actually drew pictures for us on a white board in his office. I start BCP's at the beginning of my next cycle, then it sounds like the same regimen as you. (Gonal-F, Repronex, Progesterone, HCG) They didn't say anything to me about antibiotics, but I have to go today for a cervical bacterial culture at my OB-Gyn (he's closer).

Well, enough rambling, I must get ready for work. Baby dust to you and evryone on this board!!

Alli

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2003
Fri, 08-22-2003 - 9:26am
Thanks Allie-

TGIF to you!!!!

I can relate with you on the ups and downs of our position. I really do try and remain positive, because I do have a wonderful life and an incredible DH. Without him---I'd be lost.

We also have four bedrooms-----after 9 years of marriage though and becoming "comfortable", it seems like we don't have enough room. If we are sooooooo lucky and get pregnant----where am I going to put the nursery? One bedroom is an office, the other is a workout room(this will probably be the nursery) and the third a guest room. I have a feeling getting pregnant is going to rock our world a little bit----and I can't wait.

We moved to Georgia in Sept. and started working with RE right away. Had set up the initial appt. two months before we even moved here. Since I knew things were going to get crazy with the LAP and millions of appts. with the DR. DH and I decided that I wouldn't work. It is a relief in a lot of ways. I can't imagine starting a new job and having to ask off as often as I would need to. But in other ways, it would be nice to have the distraction of work. Can't win for losing. I used to be in international sales, so I miss the relationship aspect of the job---always communicating with people. It also nice to have time to myself though.

I'm on BCP's right now. They are shrinking some cysts and prepping me for the IVF. I think the pills are messing with me a little. Even more than the injectables I was on for the IUI. Either that or the looooooooooooooooooong wait until I begin the IVF process is driving me crazy. Probably the latter.

Anyway, hope everything goes well with your appointment and have a wonderful weekend.

baby dust,

Karen

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2003
Sat, 08-23-2003 - 9:39am
Hi Karen,

My appointment went well. I really like the OB-Gyn too. He is so nice and about my age which is kind of weird, but cool. He just delivered a baby for my girlfriend from work on Wednesday. I stopped at the hospital before the appointment and met her son. He is so beautiful. That is the hospital where I will deliver :) Anyway my friend was in labor for just 10 minutes! She had 4 pushes and that was it, not even time for an epidoral. This is her first baby, too, so she even surprised the doctor.

Her husband's cousin did IVF and was successful, 2nd time I think, so they are very hopeful for me. I am so excited and hopeful. I still have to have another blood test and DH has two tests and a blood test in the month of Sept, so I feel like if we space things out, we are making progress.

The only really sucky part of the day was when I got to the Dr.'s office and there was a pregnant teen girl there. I talked to my doc and he said it's just part of his job. He said he delivered a baby last week from one of his clinic patients and the baby tested positive for methamphetamines. It makes him angry that a woman like that keeps popping out kids when a couple like us has to try so hard and will be great parents. (He also said the baby will be fine).

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and that you aren't given anything you can't deal with. We will be fine and have our babies when we are meant to. (Hopefully next summer!!) One of my extra bedrooms is a guest room, one was an office until we finished the basement, and the other is just empty. It will be the nursery. I have been superstitious about making it a room for anything else.

Well, enjoy your weekend and good luck and baby dust to all.

Alli

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2003
Sun, 08-24-2003 - 7:18pm
Hello Alli-

I am very glad you had a good dr's appt. I get the same discouraging thoughts in my head when I seen prego teens and such. Mostly it is in line at Wal-Mart using WIC vouchers with two little ones in the cart (with no shoes) and another on the way.

Ok----that was ugly wasn't it...? Enough of the negativity, but sometimes you can't help but have it get to you.

DH and I went away this weekend to Atlanta (about 1 hr away). Had a good time. I really needed to get away and get this whole IVF thing off my mind. To say that it has taken over my brain is an understatment. I just want to start. I don't know if I can hold out for another month just thinking about it. Ugh...

The BCP's I have been on are kinda messing with me still. I am spotting a little today and I swear I feel queesy. If I didn't know how unlikely it was that I was prego, I would think I had morning sickness. My appetite is zilch. Ironic taking BCP's to get pregnant huh?

Well, I am getting kicked off the computer. My husband has his fantasy football draft tonight, so I'll write later. Have a good week at work and I'll talk to you soon.

Baby dust and happy thoughts,

Karen

Pages