soft but horny

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2004
soft but horny
2
Wed, 08-18-2004 - 2:36pm
ok, just wondering if anyone has heard of this...i'm seeing someone who seems to have an abnormal sex drive (good), however, he never really is fully erect. even when he's initiating sex, we need to work a little to get him to a point where we can have intercourse and yet, he's into it and does have an orgasm, and ready for more through out the night - i don't get it. my friends and i have discussed whether it's just an emotional issue or maybe he's just one of those guys who masturbates so much that by the time night hits, his penis is just worn out, or he defines himself with sex or something so he's always pushing himself to do it, i don't know. any ideas out there?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2004
In reply to: madge2475
Thu, 08-19-2004 - 6:34am
Hmmm:

1-IMO, he should go to a urologist & get himself checked out.

2-Your man should abstain (w/c) from sex for a few days; then, see what happens.

Mac

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2003
In reply to: madge2475
Fri, 08-20-2004 - 7:08pm
Hi madge2475, welcome!

Male sexual dysfunction can be very complex. This link http://www.ivillage.com/topics/health/0,,234376,00.html to information about male sexual dysfunction may be of some help in understanding some of the underlying causes.

I agree with the other poster that the first place to start is with his urologist. His problem could be from an illness, medicines he’s taking, job or personal issues related stress or other things. The recent development of drugs such as Viagra, Cialis and Levtria sometimes make erectile dysfunction easy to treat if the patient can take the drug. His Urologist will be able to tell if one of the ED drugs might help him.

I think you are wise to use condoms with him unless you both have been tested for STIs and found clean. Usually a guy will tell you if condoms are a turn off for him. Lots of guys claim condoms affect their ability to retain an erection. If he has mentioned that, and you still want to use condoms, try Reality, the female condom. They can be purchased in pharmacies and are only slightly less effective than male condoms. The difference in effectiveness is primarily that if he slips out it is easy for him to re-penetrate you outside the sheath. So, if he does slip out it’s important that you guide his reentry so that you know he is back inside the sheath and you are still protected.

In your conversations with him has there been any indication that he could be sexually exhausting himself? If you have an opportunity to be around him constantly for several days, so you can be fairly sure that you are his only sexual release, and if his performance is exemplary… that might tell you something… Let us know how you’re doing, ok?

Good luck,

      Jill