My boyfriend will not have sex with me..

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2007
My boyfriend will not have sex with me..
3
Wed, 05-30-2007 - 6:01pm

My boyfriend and I have been dating for just under 4 years and we have lived together for 3 of those 4 years! I am very much in love with him and would be very content in speanding the rest of my life with him by my side, actually nothing in this world would make me happier...
Our main struggle in this relationship is the issue revolving around sex. He doesnt want it. Its not that he runs away from it, its just that he never brings it up. He doesnt touch me or look at me sexually, he wont even grab my butt playfully! When I try to initiate sexual behavior he pushes me away or starts to act goofy in order to turn me off. I have asked him several times why he doesnt want to be with me sexually anymore he just responds with "I am just not that sexual of a person."

Now - one could maybe buy this argument, had the first year of our relationship not happened. We had the most amazing mind blowing sex at least once a day for the entire first year and a half of our relationship and then it was just like overnight...it stopped. I know that after the honeymoon phase that things are supposed to taper off...but entirely stop?

I just want him to look over at me and have that desierous look in his eyes!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2003
Wed, 05-30-2007 - 9:46pm

Hi erinbean28, welcome!


      Jill

    

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2007
Wed, 05-30-2007 - 10:39pm

Thank you so much for that first article, I feel like that gets me started on understanding this whole thing.
He doesnt have any performance issues, his erection stays throughout the whole session and I have no problems orgasiming and neither does he. When we usually have sex he will get into it and he stays interested the whole time. The main thing that has changed is that now he will only stick to the basics, kissing, mutual masturbation, he will recieve oral but barely give in return and sex. The only time he acted frisky was about two weeks ago when he was pretty drunk and his inhabitions were out the window, the only problem was that he was drunk and the sex was sloppy, not very intamate.

I feel like I keep hitting a brick wall with him. Its been about three years since I have had a normal sex life and I wake up everyday looking at the face of the man of my dreams. I feel like I am in a torture chamber.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2003
Wed, 05-30-2007 - 11:25pm

Keep in touch, ok?


      Jill